|[<Home] [<News Archives] July 1999|
Evangelist, Pastor Elmer T. Jenkins' message was cut short Wednesday evening, as the stage underneath him, gave way. Injuries were found to be minor, but the pastor suffered from abrasions under his arms, apparently from the mesh cloth around the crane hook that was used to hoist him to safety. The entire stage was completely destroyed. It had been reinforced two weeks earlier to account for Pastor Jenkins' heavy weight. A construction worker noted, "there ain't nothin' that could have stood up under that pressure!" Officials reinforced the stage to withstand an extra 500lbs, but the pastor had put on an extra 200lbs since his last visit. The reinforcement was not capable of holding up under the extra stress.
Pastor Jenkins' shrugged off the spectacle, and joked about it the next day with Pastor Smith. "I thought you folks were ready for me!" he laughed. Pastor Smith laughed with his old friend, saying "I don't think anyone's ready for you, Elmer. If you get to Glory before I do, make sure you leave some leftovers at the Feast of the Lamb, or I'll take a bite out of your backside!"
Pastor Jenkins always leaves a memorable impression wherever he preaches.
You can bet your tithe money if there's a church picnic or potluck
within a 100 miles he'll find out about it. Oddly enough, his obesity is
actually part of his ministry. Pastor Jenkins stuffs his mouth full of
food and starts to preach, swallowing and burping as he spits out his sermon
in unintelligible mumbles. He then stops stuffing himself, and wipes
his face clean. He looks out over the audience and asks them if they understood
a word he was saying. When they respond with a 'no,' he smiles and
opens his Bible. "Gluttony is a sin," he begins, "not only is it wrong
to let food become your God, but it's hard to understand the Good News,
when the one preachin' it has a mouth full of food." When the congregation
finally sees his point, they understand that his weight is not a result
of gluttony, but rather a result of years and years of repeating the same
antidote at the beginning of his sermon.
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