[<Home] [<News Archives]                                                                        August 1999 

Landover Baptist Church is overjoyed to have three internationally recognized born-again Nazis arriving at our facility sometime in late August.  These wonderful 'Christ-centered' men will provide our existing migrant worker camp with an element of discipline that was previously lacking.  Migrant workers have been sequestered in a make-shift labor camp near the abandoned rock quarry out on old Palmer road for nearly nine months. They work in shifts, 12 hour days and 12 hour nights, to meet the November deadline for Landover Baptist's "All Purpose Multi-Temple."  The Multi-Temple, a $75million undertaking, and the brainchild of Landover Pastor, Rev. Ebeneezer Smith, will prove to be one of the greatest Christian facilities ever to exist on the face of Earth.

Heir Fredrich Engleheist, Dr. Enrich Bloomhaur, and Lt. Adolf Reinhaur, will provide their expertise in managing labor camps during WW2. Lately, the discipline level at Landover's migrant worker camp has reached  such an intolerable level, that Church officials felt that someone with real expertise in managing unwilling, unpaid, underfed gypsies, needed to be called in.

Pastor Ebeneezer Smith has called for calm upon Church members who suspect that something more sinister might be unveiled after this new administration gains control of the camp. "Be assured that these gentlemen are born again Christians," Rev. Smith confirmed, "our migrant workers have a better situation now than they had in their respective countries, they refuse to see what good we have done for them. We have provided shelter, food, and clothing, the three basic necessities of life, and they insist on being rebellious." After some discussion, the congregation was relieved to hear the news from Pastor Smith himself, who later commented, "We have tried everything with these people.. these undisciplined gypsies. Be assured, that this latest move is the final solution."

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