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The Mighty Bruisers
Homosexual Deprogramming Ministry

In anticipation of The Mighty Bruiser's arrival in SanFrancisco the week of March 7th, we quote a Time Magazine article dated Oct 4th 1995. "Never has a Religious Gay Community been in such a state of panic, such a state of confusion and horror, as when they are made aware of an impending visit from the 'Mighty Bruisers.'" Group member Kenny Johnson speaks of the group as, "A means to an end. If you are gay, and you think you are a Christian (of any denomination) you simply are not, according to my Bible." Dan Pason added, "We sometimes are forced to act in full accordance with Levitical Law, and this means torture and oftentimes certain death for anyone who refuses to give up the gay lifestyle." Derrick Gurney notes, "We haven't had to kill anyone yet, we have had a 100% success rate." That success rate is tied in with the gay individual's option, in Stevie Latino's words, "to either abandon his homosexual lifestyle, or take a baseball bat to the back of the skull." When offered this choice, we usually find that the gay person would rather avoid the pain." Mr. Gurney added, "We are to get people saved by any means necessary, and we thank God for the book of Leviticus.. without it.. we'd still be gay." Group member Ching Ding is an expert in ancient Chinese torture and confession practices, his services have been called upon in only two occasions, one being the current visit to Landover Homosexual Outreach Ministry Operation (H.O.M.O.) in San Francisco. "There are over two thousand practicing homosexuals in the Landover extension church," Gurney said at a recent press conference, ".. and we are only six people with baseball bats. Give us 24 hours, two rolls of paper towels, a lead pipe, a couple tire irons, five gerbils, a candle, and a 14 inch plastic tube, and you will be surprised at what we can accomplish." Landover Baptist is proud to have the Mighty Bruisers as an addition to their outreach in the Homosexual community.  

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