A Historical Tour of Landover Baptist's
AUTHORITATIVE HISTORY OF LANDOVER BAPTIST HELL HOUSES:
The first Hell House ever took place in a two
room shack at the end of a dirt road off Interstate 7 near Freehold, Iowa.
The admission price was $3 to see President Carter squat down in a
make-shift furnace while his buck China-man's teeth were pulled off by a
church Deacon dressed up as a demon. Two other robed Deacons angrily jammed
pitchforks into his lying liberal hiney while a record of "Stairway to
Heaven" played in the background. That was many years ago, but the
Halloween ministry was so popular, it still survives till this day..
HELL HOUSE 2010
Human Fetuses Needed to Make Baptist Hell House More Fun
Landover Baptist is going green this Halloween by recycling
aborted human fetuses!The Junior High Youth Group is also
working diligently to get 2 tons of human feces and 825
gallons of human urine to the House in time for the October
24th Grand Opening!
HELL HOUSE 2009
Baptist University for the Saved Opens Halloween Hell Hospital!
horrifying peek inside one of Obama's government run hospitals is the
blood-curdling theme for this year's Halloween Hell House of Terror! Opening in
mid-September to sold out crowds! Get your tickets today!
Graphic Souvenir Map & More!>
HELL HOUSE 2008
Obama's Ghastly Ghetto of Demoncratic Terror!
A series of
rooms depicting the horrors of a make-believe world that could exist if by some
horrifying accident, Barack Obama were elected President. Baptist students
constructed rooms by researching Drudge Report and listening to Rush Limbaugh.
Hell House 2008 by Clicking Here!>
HELL HOUSE 2007, 2006 &
2005 (2003 Partial)
Full Investigation, Department of Health & Human Services Halts Construction on
Landover Baptist Hell House Until Further Notice!
Department of Heath & Human Services shut down Jesus for
several years due to improper arrangement of biohazardous materials!
HELL HOUSE 2004
Kerry's Blood Curdling Agenda For America!
Participants will be guided into
different areas where they will be exposed to the horrifying reality of what
America would be like, if by some hellish miracle, John Kerry were to become
President of the United States! Visit Seven terrifying rooms developed by the
Landover Baptist Senior High Youth Group.
House 2004 by Clicking Here!>
HELL HOUSE 2003
Haunted Hell House to Feature More Than Just the Dumpster Full of Rotting
guns, real bullets, real blood, real body parts, real fetuses, and if possible –
biological weapons and reasonably priced military grade rocket launchers for
this year’s Hell House. Now all we need is the Federal Government to sneak in
here and ruin a fun Halloween for everyone!
2003 Hell House!>
HELL HOUSE 1999-2002
of Mary Queen of Heaven Haunted Catholic Church and Interactive Online Hell
77th annual (public) Hell House. This year, folks are expected to arrive from
all 50 states. They will wait for hours in line to visit 12 horrific rooms in a
Haunted Cathedral that once served as a demonic house of worship for Catholics
in the latter part of this century!
Interactive Hell House!>
to the Rescue! Turning a Halloween Tragedy Into a a Godly Blessing: Read about how
our church flew in hundreds of corpses from Turkey's 1999 earthquake for use
in our annual Hell House ministry.