|SURFIN' THE NET WITH JESUS!
Note: If you haven't done anything to get Jesus mad at you, the links will open in a new window. If they don't, consider yourself in danger of burning in HELL!
Hello to all the sheep in the flock! It's June already! I can't wait to spend some time on the Pastor's yacht, wearing my brand-new one-piece wool bathing suit. Jesus showed me a lot of links this month, so if you can't finish them all, bookmark this page and come back later. Don't make me tell Jesus on you!
Isn't it wonderful that our Godly President lead us through a just war against Iraq, a country that presented an immediate threat to us? That tricky Sodom Hoosain hid them weapons of mass destruction, including 500 tons of chemicals (think of 500 big ol' fat elephants!), and with God's help, the Godly Coalition troops will find them. And that makes the libruls so mad! SHUT UP, foul libruls! We now have a Godly True Christian man (and what a man!) in office, a war hero, not a liar like that damn Clinton! Republicans are the party of personal responsibility. So just shut up! Americans voted Bush into office last time, and they'll do it again next year!
Americans know that this Christian Nation yearns for the Family Values only available from True Christians. Americans know that free trade and fair competition are important to our future. Americans love our free press and praise the FCC for making it freer by shutting out the whiny libruls and their stupid opinions that no one wants to hear, and we'll be able to trust our news sources again, once they're all under Godly Republican control. We know what's right and wrong, unlike the libruls, who are too stupid to listen to the truth. The librul media is on the way out!
Americans know they can trust us and all our efforts to turn this nation around--from Faith-Based Ministries to finding out who was behind the 9-11 disaster to stopping the evil Demoncrats to helping children to punishing the French for not supporting our Godly war. Americans know we are the party of intelligence, and we True Christians are bringing about a better world. And with Bush in charge, we can't lose!
And still the libruls whine and try to be dividers, not uniters!
My friends, our country is in so much better shape now that the evil Clinton is out of office and Godly Republicans are running all three branches of government. We're much happier and better off financially, and Baptists throughout the nation and world are reaching out and saving millions! We True Christians and Republicans, as everyone knows, are all about love, honor and integrity.
Libruls, you're next!
Till next month, don't forget to read your Bible!
In Christian Love,