February 2001

Surfin' the Net With Jesus!
February 2001

By Judy O'Christian

Praise the Lord! I am so thrilled that our new Resident, George W. Bush, has taken office and is dismantling all the nonsense laws that evil demoncrat Clinton brought upon us in his quest to please his master, Satan. John Ashcroft put it best when he said, "We have no king but JESUS!" Glory to God! Godly Republicans will fix everything!

We True Christians will uphold the family values ignored by liberal politicians! The majority party in Washington is the upholder of the standards set forth way back in the 1950s. It's time to Godly men like Pat Boone.
It seems the liberals will do anything to discredit our new resident! And we need to pray for Mr. Bush!!  Truly he will stop the evil liberals from trying to pass so-called "hate crimes" laws. Every True Christian knows there's no such thing as a "hate crime"! I'll say it again for the liberals in the audience: NO SUCH THING.

Finally, Texas fashions will be back "in," like they was when LBJ took over after the "unfortunate incident" in Dallas. True Christians know how to do things right!

George W. Bush will put Godly men to work in government, just like his daddy and other Godly presidents did. Glory to God! He will promote Compassionate Conservatism, something the liberals hate because they just like to see people suck off the government teat. Liberals hate it when a man can pull himself up by his bootstraps, get himself a few Mexicans who'll work for nothing, and make himself a million dollars. Don't even think of telling me about how important the so-called "environment" is, you liberals! Christians are in charge now! And nobody is more compassionate and just plain nice than Christians!

Truly Mr. Bush will uphold God's will for this nation and save us from the disastrous road that evil liberal Clinton tried to set us on! Even the liberal media won't be able to cover up Bush's goodness! And that goodness will soon spread across the nation. Soon the Ten Commandments will be everywhere!

That about does it for this column. Till next time, start getting your Texas fashions out of the mothballs! And remember--spread across the whole nation!

Don't forget, Jesus knows where you live!
In Him,

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