A Small Sample of Landover Baptist Mail Received March 2006  (unedited and in original form)

Your site is not of Jesus Christ, Calling people out of their names and saying the things you say are from the pit of Hell. The Lord rebuke you, You are an insult in calling yourselves Christians. I pray all of you get saved, repent of your ungodly ways before you die in your state. Acts 2:38. You ought to be ashamed of yourselves. The BLOOD OF JESUS is against you devils.I hope you don't have to remember these words in hell. Acts 2:38. Be ye Holy for I am Holy saith the LORD. ( you luke warm people will get spit out of God's mouth. Remember you have been warned. May the Lord have mercy on all of you.

Joy02james@---.com


It is people like you that give Christians a bad name. Did not Jesus say “when you do unto the smallest of my creatures it is as if you are doing unto me”. You have tortured a bunch of “rabbits” in front of children. You need mental help and a reaffirmation of Gods love. In my opinion you are no better than all the other fanatics bastardizing there religion.

Chip Lucas

your stupid for writing something about a great movie like The Ice age just because bible don’t say anything about and ice age don’t mean it is not true so you all have to shut your fuck'n mouth and stick it up ur ass fucker

Meli Mon


Please forgive me, i have to ask this but is this website serious or an elaborate joke?

Alex Smith


Dear Sir, Your radical belief system makes my very soul tremble with anger and pity. You speak of not allowing anyone who is not a born again believer into your church. You are a FOOLISH and legalistic man, and I pray that the LORD will reveal to you your folly. If we are not to commune with the unrighteous then how are they to see the love of Christ that exists in us. You say you follow the bible as a whole and not as a part, but you fail to realize that Jesus our LORD and Savior not only spoke to, dined with, and healed, he also forgave. You and your rash belief system will do nothing but bring shame to the name of LORD. Our job and purpose is to worship and love the LORD our GOD. He also said that we were to love one another as we love ourselves.

Also I am compelled to believe that you forgot one important thing. In Mathew 28:18-20; it reads:

"Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.""

This passage clearly states that we are to go out into the world and make disciples. And as am to believe correctly, in the original text there is only one verb "make." My question to you is how do you make disciples if you don't fellowship with them. Yes we are to seek that of Christian counsel as often as we can, bit that does not mean we can't speak or be with anyone that is not saved.

Jesus Christ was constantly with the unrighteous, those who were normal average people.

For example, the woman at the well. There were many reasons why Jesus shouldn't have talked to here. First, she was a Samaritan. Second, she was a woman. Jesus talked with her and once again gave her hope and forgiveness. Oh, by the way she was a sinner and Jesus knew about it. She had been married several times and the man she was with she wasn't even married to. My heart aches for you and the people that share this belief and I will be in prayer for you that your eyes may be opened to compassion and forgiveness of God. I would very much like to speak with you personally some day and I would also like you to email me ASAP.

Stephanie Atkins and Scott Gilmore


The site you created is total bullshit, What you need to do is look into who ever made that site and called them a homosexual because either one they are sick and twisted and messed up in the head or queer, Thanks for the entertainment the site you have is not about how to keep a child from going gay but to insure that he is

Jerry Noneya


is this real? like seriously? is there a centralized community? where is it?

Adam Richards


I AM SORRY, BUT, I WAS VERY UNCOMFORTABLE WHEN I SAW THE PICTURE AT THE BOTTOM OF YOUR SITE OF A WOMAN IN A THONG. THAT DOESNT SEEM LIKE SOMETHING I WOULD EXPECT TO SEE ON A CHURCH SITE. MAYBE I MISUNDERSTOOD. BUT, I STILL FEEL IT IS INNAPPROPRIATE. I WAS JUST LOOKING FOR THE CHURCH THAT IS SPONSORING THE CRUISING FOR JESUS CAR SHOW IN GILROY THAT IS COMING UP. THANKS GOD BLESS

RCLOXEY


Your website is a disgrace. You disgust me with your filthiness.

Kathy Dailey


Greetings in the Lord Pastor, I must beg your forgiveness for being so blunt BUT WHAT are you doing? Your accept Jesus get a playstation page has me really upset... I will tell you why Growing up I went to church camp many times in the summer... many summers at alter call I felt like I should repent and went forward each time asking God to save me and making profession BUT each time my "profession" did not last long, I just could not live a Godly life... eventually I blamed God, became bitter and bacame a crack addict and heavy drinker. At the bottom of the bottom in my life... GOD in HIS TIME not mine opened my spiritual understanding and the scales fell off and I was genuinely BORN Again... only then did I have power from the Holy Spirit to "stay" living Godly... what you are romoting could cause false professions, confusion and guilt much less disrespect to parents... I beg of you PLEASE pray sincerely about this!!! and if you want give something away... GIVE a BIBLE!!!!

Prayers for you,

Sincerely

By His Mercy and Grace alone,

Annissa Peavy

Christian Wholesale Ministries


I hope you all fucking die. If pushing a tampon inside you is a sin, then what of that small ass christian penis that was inside you when you got knocked up by your pastor, or hell even molested as a child. Quit punishing the intelligent and provocative with your insecurities. Just because you can't find truth in this world, does NOT mean that you have to spread the 'word' of the Lord as the definite and almighty truth. You are fucking ridiculous. Find something more to do with your time, go suck horse cock, or something that actually proves fruitful.

Jason Michael Churchill

California...HOLLYWOOD!!!!

That is right Hollywood, where all the fuck-ups live.


Judge not lest ye be judged.. Your site is either a mockery of the living word or you are just plain out right demonic yourself. Jesus Loved the sinner and helped bring them out of sin to Repentance. Not judge them harshly. You should be ashamed of what you are saying. Do you think GOD is not in control? Try winning the lost with LOVE and Kindness. Your ways are completely run on laws...No grace. O yeah if men are allowed to Masturbate at 65....wouldn't they still be committing adultery? To even think of another woman sexually is committing adultery. Remember....Also be careful what you may say about me when you finish this letter.....God has called HIS anointed ones to speak to a world today and you are not an exception. REPENT and turn back to your first love and get off of your POWER TRIP to MAKE people believe in GOD. We live in the WORLD not heaven yet. We are to win souls for Christ, not scare them. SHAME ON YOU> your heart is right in that sin is sin. But you have gone about it the wrong way and the torture that you imply on your own is even more evil then what you accuse the world of. You have no right in JESUS name to harm anyone for the sake of heaven. That is not your place. Plus to judge souls to hell is also not your job. Be warned GOD is a GOD of Mercy and LOVE. May your heart find peace in GOD and not vengeance. Also you struggle with homosexuality..It is so obvious. You judge it so harshly and talk about allot. I think it is your deepest fear of what you feel you may be. Quit it...STOP You are not the judge. May GOD forgive you and may your eyes be opened to His Love again...

Azariah Dean


To Whom It May Concern

I am appaled at your web site. I can't believe you call yourselves Christians. your web site promotes everything against against the Christian Way. You need to really examine yourself and your doctrine and READ THE BIBLE. Gal. 5:19-21. Rom. 13:11-14

Concerned Christian

Mrpreacherguy@---.com


Is this website a joke....if so, it's not funny

Melissa Miller


To whom it may concern

I took some of your quizzes, and was very disgusted. Not to some of the questions, but when I got it wrong, it called me a unsaved idiot. I have been a Christian for a long time now, and I know the bible well enough to know that God does not think of his children as idiots.

I do not think it is nice how you call people idiots, you might think it is just fun, but what does God say once again. “Watch what comes out of our mouths”

I cannot believe what I saw, and straight away I stopped the quiz , it would be nice to change it to something nice and uplifting to people that might not be as good as other people that know the bible. This put me off straight away, and it might even turn people from God, and I do believe you do not what to do that. As then you will have to answer to God for that.

I am not judging you at all, I believe I am trying to show you what mistakes you have made with this quiz. And you need to fix the problem, as soon as possible. Well I hope you find it in your heart that you hear from God also that this is also displeasing to Him.

Well take care and God bless.

Julie Dietrich


I just read that article on child rearing and I think you people are sick.

Beat a child? A child should be loved and cared for, never beaten. I should know, I happen to be a married mother of seven children.

Now I do agree with spanking a child when necessary, but never beating them. I should report your site to the authorities and I plan to do just that.

Melanie Roberts


hello, I was just wondering if your church was real and if so where may I attend one of your services near Omaha, NE?

Joe Riss


After several years staying away from your web site (because how unfaithful your Pastor is), I thought I would return to see if anything has improved. NOPE. In fact, it seems to have even more filth. I was shocked to see that your website is displaying a nude frontal scene from the movie Brokeback Mountain. You should know that kids are coming across your website and it is inappropriate for minors to see this image! 

REMOVE IT! REMOVE IT! REMOVE IT! 

You guys should be investigated. What in the world are you people teaching there at your church?

Darren Naath


Hello Pastor at Landover Baptist. I write you respctfully, as I trust that you are a man of God. Although, I am concerned about something that emanated from your website article, "Oral Sex: A Dangerous New Trend".

I am an African American, Born again Christian man. I was reading you article from your website about oral sex. I found it to be appauling, ignorant and lacking facts.

Your first assumption, insenuating that black men have enormous penises, is not documented by any scientific research that I ever heard of. This is unfounded rhetoric that does nothing but reinforce stereotypes.

Secondly, to make a claim that black men commit so much crime is insensitve as a Christian and as a human being. You should not be making offensive statements about anyone, especially statements without substantiation.

I do understand the message that you are trying to get across about oral sex, but you must find a way to articulate it with tact, dignity and respect for our fellow man.

Teach from the word of God and be led by the Holy Spirit, not by your own understanding. I do not intend for this e-mail to begin a war of words, I am just expressing the displeasure that I am sure many Blacks across the world would have with this article.

I do pray that the Lord will further your ministry as you preach Jesus and spread the Gospel worldwide. May God bless you as you do his will.

Bro. Jeff Huston


St. Patrick was a bishop of Ireland who converted pagans to Christianity. He used the shamrock to explain the Holy Trinity to the heathens. This holiday is to commemorate this great man, and it does not necessarily have anything to do with drinking alcohol or leprachauns!

You people twist the word of God to spread lies and hatred. Jesus would be disappointed in you. It is this kind of self-righteous hypocrisy that turns people away from Christ. Perhaps you should reexamine the true meaning of being a Christian before you go condemning people.

Judge not, or ye shall be judged thyself!

I pray that you will find the peace and love of Jesus and turn away from your evil prejudices.

Joseph Bartoleit


Sir, You are free to think what you will. But before God you are not free to spread lies and to engage in rhetoric which is based on lies and falsehoods. What appears on your web site having to do with St. Patrick's Day is frankly to someone who was born and raised a Catholic Christian in an Irish home is not only false but it is highly insulting. I would strongly suggest that you take it down immediately. I am notifying the Irish Consulate in Washington of the site and the falsehoods that you perpetuate. I know were I too engage in the same kind of diatribe about Baptists there would outrage. Your presentation is a disgrace. Brother Brendan Brennan

Brendan Brennan


BLASPHEMY! How dare you Bible-bashing evangelical knob-heads speak utter crap about the Holy Catholic Church.

You're all going straight to Hell, and I will ask Mary to make sure of it.

Study Theology you dim wits, know that you can't take the Bible as literal. JESUS is the WORD of God, made incarnate.

Oh, and remember who made the Bible - the Catholic Church!

Go to Hell the lot of you John Browne (J B) Opus Dei


Billy Houston,

My name is Chance Touchstone. I’m a 28 year old (cool) Christian who was intrigued by the “Winning souls to Christ in the World of Warcraft” page I stumbled upon on your website. I’m not much that great at ministering to people yet but I’m a huge gamer and I’ve wanted to create or join a Christian clan/guild in a game for a while now. But I don’t know many Christian gamers and most of my close friends aren’t saved.

Recently I felt like God urged me to create a “Jesus” Character in world of warcraft. So I did. I was amazed that I could actually make a human priest in the game that looked exactly like the traditional looking Jesus figures you’ve seen in Christian movies. After 5 mins of playing I stumbled upon a Christian clan (Christian Crusaders on the Emerald Dream server) who loved my character. They invited me into their clan and made me a recruiter. They said their clan of 32 people was only 1 hr old. Coincidence? This has actually been the funniest character I’ve ever played in any game. And it’s been encouraging me to learn more scriptures incase I have the opportunity to quote them.

The first day of playing and I got amazing responses from other players. I always play the character in a positive and respectful manner. At the least, they would think it was funny. But the second day, I had several people complaining that my characters name was insulting to them and they were going to report me and have me banned. I did as little as walk by them and they would message me complaining. One guy seemed he just wanted to argue. After telling them “I apologize if I’ve offended them in any way” and etc. eventually I would just walk away.

Anyway, have you had any problems with religious restrictions in WOW? If there is some kind of restriction for me having Jesus as my character, do you know if there is anything I can do to fight it? Also, I would love to follow your foot steps and learn what I can from you & your clan/guild. How can I find our more about your Christian clan?

Sorry for taking your time. Keep up the good work.

Chance Touchstone

Northwood Christian Center



You so-called Christians have created a doctrine of obsurdness. As with many other demon influenced, so-called Christian churches. You're all about MONEY, unforgiveness, and demons. Would Jesus fine his people? Your 50 some odd years, of established "CHURCH", means nothing. In the last days many FALSE churches will be set-up. Yours is right in there with them.

Many great teachings of Jesus have been perverted by Satan, working through idiots that don't have good sense. You people are living proof! You're church will fall someday, I FEEL SURE! My father in heaven is not the tryrant you people are aligning yourselves with. Professing and teaching. God is just and forgiving. You church IS NOT! You fine and penalize, as does a communist dictator(s). You seem to have many.

You need to GO BACK, look at the one that set that crap up, under the NAME of my Lord and Savior. Investigate them, expose the truth, and STOP charging your sheep for your corruption. You must turn from your evil, vile, and wick ways. Because you definately are a demonic church under guise of the Lord. Your lord is deceiving all of you, as an angel of light. It justs feels SO right to all of you huh?

There are ungodly churches created everyday. You're right there with 'em! You are to forgive, NOT CHARGE MONEY AND MAKE PEOPLE SUFFER! The Catholics do the same thing also. They use a man, acting a God earth, which holds a bend cross, with a deformed Jesus at the top of the staff that has been used as an occult symbol of anicent days. They also charge money to get you into heaven, as well as many other ways to GET MONEY. When are you guys going to start doing that?

Your people are leaving, and will continue to leave, because your teachings are off the wall, and you have a sick doctrine. It's amazing you print the absurdness. Your church needs healing by the Lord. If your church doesn't, it will answer on judgement day. All of the "PASTORS" will held to the strongest account. Read the Bible, and comprehend it.

I won't pray for your evil little church, because if any man (men) be ignorant, let him (them) be ignornant. I hope it falls soon.

You guys are making some good money aren't you? As hard as it is now a days to earn money, YOU JACKASSES are doing your best to relieve them of it. Who doesn't money, huh? You take advantage, because people are not perfect. Never will be! THAT IS A GREAT SCAM/TRICK. Your blind sheep will open their eyes, I ask, in the name of my Lord Jesus, that they fall away from your occultic little church.

Your doctrine is brainwashing, CONFUSION, and creating money slaves. God is NOT the author of CONFUSION, and slaves. My Lord sets people free of bondage.

Remember Jesus having a beard? God isn't concerned about "YOUR" isolated RULES. He has a thing or two in store for your policies someday. What you sow..... Rest assured.

No need to e-mail me back, and try, as you must, to indoctrinate me, spit out your forked tongue rules, and letter of law, teach me a thing or two, and get the demon out of me! As you are probably thinking. Your WORDS are null and void, according to the ridiculiousness of your church rules.

YOU IDIOTS SHOULD BE FINED $1,000,000 FOR THAT VOMIT YOU'RE EXPELLING ON OTHERS. Bob (Robert Anderson)

www.smirkingchimp.com