April 2007 Quiz

The Latest Product Line From Landover Baptist

George W. Bush - Official 2004 Campaign Site

Landover NET - Online Community!

60 Second Sermons

Expert Christian Advice

Accept Christ and Get a Free Playstation2

Bible versus Crystal Ball

God is omnipotent, omnipresent and all-knowing. Yet, strangely, when it comes to making predictions, He is less reliable than a gypsy with a switchblade up her babushka. See if you can identify when the Lord fumbled a prognostication in the KJV 1611 Holy Bible. Click here or below for answers.

1. When did Jesus predict He would return?

A. Approximately 2,000 years after he ascended into Heaven, meaning the Second Coming is just a few years away.
B. At the start of the third millennium, meaning the Lord is seven years late.
C. Shortly after he resurrected, meaning He is almost a couple thousand years late.
D. Trick question. Jesus promised to return but didn’t give a time frame.

2. When does the Bible forcast the apocalypse will occur?

A. During the apostles’ lifetimes.
B. During the generation in which Jesus lived.
C. Never. The Bible says God promised never to violently destroy the planet again after he flooded it the first time. The earth will always be here.
D. All of the above.

3. What did God predict would happen to the Israelis?

A.They would become the dominant people of the planet – as numerous as the stars in Heaven -- with the dominant religion of the world.
B. They would live in peace forever, safe from all their enemies. In fact, they would never be forced to scatter.
C. Their nation would become an ally of Egypt and Syria.
D. All of the above.

4. Whom did God predict would rule the Israelis?

A. God made no predictions about the governing bodies of contemporary nation-states.
B. David and his descendants would rule the Jews as their kings forever.
C. The Old Testament correctly predicted the lineage of each prime minister of Israel to the present time.
D. None of the above.

5. What did God predict would happen to Iraq?

A. It would become uninhabitable for humans. In fact, it would become the residence of choice for dragons.
B. Its men would turn into drag queens.
C. A and B.
D. It would become a haven for terrorists.

6. What did God predict would happen to Egypt?

A. It would become an uninhabitable wasteland.
B. Anyone who moved there would die a violent death.
C. The Egyptians would all turn to God.
D. All of the above.

7. What did God predict would happen to the Nile River?

A. It would remain the longest river in the world.
B. It would become a vital source of commerce and tourism for the Middle East.
C. It would dry up completely while there were still kings ruling Egypt.
D. A and B.

8. What did Jesus foretell would happen to the stars in space?

A. They would fall to the Earth, like tiny light bulbs.
B. They would last forever, providing light and warmth to the much smaller planets that revolve around them.
C. Their light would go out, as the gases that fuel them dissipated.
D.None of the above.

9. When does the Bible say all will have heard the Word of the Lord?

A. Never. Jesus will return before even all of Israel has heard the Word of God.
B.During the time of the apostles, all had already heard the Word of God.
C. A and B.
D. The Bible is silent on the subject.

10. What does God foresee happening to those who make predictions about what God will do?

A. If their predictions are accurate, they are likely to earn a good living.
B. They will be rewarded in Heaven with riches unthinkable to mere mortals for spreding God's message.
C. Their parents will kill them.
D. None of the above.





Click Here For More Landover Baptist Bible Quizzes!




Copyright 1998-2007, Americhrist Ltd. All rights reserved. Terms of Service
The Landover Baptist website is not intended to be viewed by anyone under 18

Click to Visit the Landover Store!

As Seen on Network Television: Wear Nasty Bible Verses
Biblical Wisdom Gear!

Like the Site?  Buy the Book from the Writers of Landover Baptist!
Click to Get Our Godly Book!

Value T-Shirts in the Landover Baptist Store!
Click Here!