November 2008

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Letters To Landover: "Pastor's Mailbag"

A Small Sample of e-mails unedited and in original form


Hows it going church? Just an email here from a curious atheist.

This letter is not to shout at you, but to better understand so pleace continue reading and reply :)

The main reason for believing in religion is because of institutionalized religion. Sometimes, whole cultures are centered around religion. This belief is often unexamined by each follower as it is accepted as fact. And something that is unexamined and is just accepted as fact without question and without proof cannot be logically justified. I must say what really forced me to write this email. I read the page on the 'black Jesus' costumes ( and found something that i would like you to explain to me. It says, on that page, "It is one thing to try to make colored Christian folks feel better about themselves by making up a story about Jesus being a Colored person, but when real people actually start believing it - that's when it gets dangerous! Folks get hurt!" Some people believe that Jesus is black through straight up sheer acceptance and what you might describe as 'ignorance'. Do you agree? This is important: I feel that Christianity does the same thing. People accept that Jesus is black as they have been told so or because it may seem logical. People believe in Christianity as they have been told so or because it seems the only explanation for the complexity of the world and the situation humans are in. They are both unexamined. I wish that every Christian would exam their beliefs. Not so they can turn athiest, but so they can understand that their beliefs do not have to be taken as true by everyone and so they can better understand. As Plato once said: 'The unexammined life is not worth living.' :)

If you wish to belief, then that is fine. But in my opinion, and through logic, Christianity cannot be said as certainly true. And if so, the word of it, its laws, rules and beliefs, does not have to be taken as true, nor can it be forced on somebody else as right. I am sure that you can, if not agree, comprehend my testament and hopefully find it convincing enough to do some thinking, to better understand.

David Harvey

Why do Catholics worship mary? This is a common misconception by those who do not do their research before speaking. I have been born and raised into the Catholic church and NEVER ONCE have I ever been taught to "worship Mary". We only honor her and ask her to hear our prayers, after all, she was special enough to be chosen by know, the Blessed Mother and all. I do hope that whomever posted this article knows that judging others is not his dare he quote the bible and then turn and judge. It's sad, and I will pray for him.

C York

While looking for Christain Bus Tours, I ran across your homepage. I feel I should let you know, I pray you don't know this, but there is an Advertisement on there with a picture of a woman in thong panties saying Sarah Paline panties. I pray there is not a church especially Baptist Church that would sell or knowingly advertise this trash. I would like more information on your Bus Tours schedules unless you approve the aboved mentioned advertisement (If you do keep the information)

Thank you Doris Mitchell

I didn't realize Jesus charged for his services. Tithing is one thing, charging someone money to attend a meeting of fellowship with others who believe in the Lord God is another. It's no wonder that we are losing our children to satan...he doesn't charge anything for his sermons!

Laurie Biswell

excuse me but take your head out of your a** and look up wicca and satinism online there completely diffrent religions for one wiccans use gold in there rituals and satin worshipers cant because its a pure metal god has brother kill brother (able and kane) jesus makes you bow down and kiss his feet or he'll strike you down as a wiccin are way is pure and not evil we use mother earth and the way of the indians we are anything but eveil are othe will tell you that "harm none do what you will" when becoming a witch you have to swear you wont use your powers to harm anyone or anything when you decide to trash a religion you need to no what your talking about and not just be stuck in your fantasy world this is 2009 not 1800's its time for you to get with reality if you want to be a christan that fine everyone has there own choice of religion but freedom of religon mean every religion not just some andi dont no what kind of fantasy world you live in because i garantee some of these stories you have on here are redicules at first i thought it was funny but then i started reading more and am just insulted people like you is whats wrong with society these days because your close minded and cant accept people for who they really are the kind of people your describing as being wiccans sound like gothics and saintin worshippers get your titles right before you start talking trash we respect your religion so respect ours!!!

Robin Burdick

Is this a freaking joke??? I'm guessing it must be a joke because it is so ridiculous. But if it is not a joke it's nice to know that this is how you feel jesus treats ALL humanity. What proof do you have that Obama is muslim? You don't because there isn't any. This kind of hate filled speech is strictly forbidden in YOUR bible. Your god is not honored by this kind of discrimination and hatred for humans with different colored skin. How dare you do this in the name of your god or any god. If there is a hell, you and all of your followers will burn in it. You are poisoning these children with slander. What does politics have to do with religion? How could you be so moronic? It is just sickening. I really hope this is a joke. If not, you people are just sick.

Sam Coloradov6

If you were truly born again and knew the word of Jesus as Lord you would know that Jesus said to abstain from all appearance of evil.

If you ever were visited by demons like I was in some American hotels you would not be putting on this show.

You are inviting the underworld to partake in your show, even if many get saved many will go home with demons from your show.

Narrow is the way that leads to life and few there be that find it.....

Spend time and watch some of the videos and listen to some of the audio's. Jesus Lord God almighty will speak to your heart and show you time is short and not every one that saith Lord Lord will enter into the kingdom of heaven.....

TMIMFG@ao[last letter of email extracted].com

I really hope that your website is joke, I hope and pray that you guys are kidding about all of this, because it all seems like a very sarcastic joke. So if it is, then you can stop reading this email and continue on with your beautiful day.

But if not...keep reading.

So I know you don't know me and I really don't know you, but I thought I would just offer you this one piece of advice!

"Build bridges, not walls"

You are a disgrace to the Christian faith and are the exact opposite of what Christ believed and lived. I follow the teachings of Jesus and nowhere does any of this crap appear in the Bible. We honestly need to buy a suit when we get saved?!?! A SUIT?!?!?! WHY?????? Please tell me why because if I go to hell because I don't have a suit then I will be pissed!! Why do you not accept the unsaved?? Jesus did!! He thrived on them, he loved them when no one else did and saw life in their eyes and hope in everything that they were not. He instructed us to do the same and even if he didn't, we should do it anyway because it is just being plain nice. So go be nice to someone and stop being such douchebags!


Christoper Pittman

Your website about what to do as a Christian on Halloween is horrible. I myself am a Christian, who does not celebrate in any way Halloween nor do my children. But your website was so disturbing that I read only 1.5 paragraphs and had to stop! You as a self proclaimed Christian have such mean spirited hatred in your words. The Lord tells us to hate the sin not the sinner! And when you advocate throwing blood on children you are the one's who give us God fearing Christians a terrible name. How able just not answering the door.

Daniel at

i just found your alls site im sorry but i think you all are flippin nuts. if not for a sinner why bother wish a chruch? to say they are not welcome? im sorry but if you do not allow sinners who can they be saved? and to say toys are satanic? omg. its hard to beleive that you all are allowed to run around in public. get a grip a toy is a toy is a toy. and as for breast feeding how do you think mary fed jesus? with a bottle? i don't think so. you people need a clue. sorry but its true. and im sorry if i come off harsh but after seeing your site i got upset its sad to see people actually think like this. and clay aiken is not a punk rocker. he is just a singer and a good one at that. you all have the nerve to call miley cyrus a slut when sarah palins kis is gonna have a baby? pot calling the kettle black i see.

MstrsCat4u@ao[last letter of email extracted].com

You have got to be fucking kidding me. You hypocritic bastard. You will stoop to that level to get money for your pocket, knowing there is no thing as God or heaven or hell. I wish there were a hell for people like YOU to suffer forever for what you do to innocent victims who actually believe your BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kimberly Potter

Dear Pastor

I'm Craig Mobey from the UK and I have discovered some... lets say twisted beliefs on your site and I believe they are completely unGodly and I think they should be taken down.

I have taken some extracts from your site and I have not modified them in anyway. Anything in bold is what I'm completely outraged at rather than just outraged.

What amazes me is that you’ve studied the Left Behind series and referenced your supplemental Chick tracts so carefully that you’ve noticed the one tiny oversight in these gripping pre-history volumes. Yes, for while our dear brothers in Christ Tim LaHaye and Jerry B. Jenkins did a wonderful job channeling God’s gloriously dramatic premeditated plans for mass genocide into those books, they chose to omit one important detail of the glorious Rapture. Specifically, that when Jesus sucks you out of your clothes into Heaven, the force of His holy vacuum will be so great that it will shear every hair from your body, every breast and nipple from your chest, and praise God, every tallywhacker and hoochie that dangles or rests between the sacred legs of every Bible believing Christian on the face of the earth. Yes! The Lord will see to it that our clothes, and our vile sex organs are the only things that get left behind. Shout Glory!

As you know the Lord created all of us in his image, and he was pleased with what he had created. If their sexual organs are so 'vile' then couldn't the Lord almighty have used his wisdom and intellect to create other organ systems for humans to reproduce. He didn't so I'm sure he doesn’t think their vile. Also God said that sex is a gift from Him and that is to be shared between a man and women in marriage so your point completely deludes me, AND since this is the stuff you are giving children to read I am very very angry and I'm sure God is too.

Post-Rapture, Jesus and His Daddy will be preoccupied with savagely slaughtering an ungrateful 90% of the world who didn’t give Him 10% of their paychecks, for having a lifetime of fun at the Lord’s expense. I get a big old belly laugh when I think about the horrors that await unsaved people. Why after they get over the initial shock of discovering that the millions of person-free girdles and jockey shorts lying around town aren't actually empty after all, but are in fact filled with the soggy, smelly, disembodied giblets of their former owners! I tell you, it is gonna be a real hoot to watch the expressions on their faces from our front row seats in Heaven! Oh Lordy! I am laughing out loud right now as I am writing this!

Who ever wrote this article is sadistic beyond belief, I can't believe a Christian who is ment to be forgiving; free from prejustice would be pleased to watch these events, if they ever will happen which I doubt since I believe in a loving and fair God no someone who tortures unbelievers for kicks. AND again this is for kids to be reading, it disgusts me to think that children might believe this nonsense and even have their life’s changed because of it!

I can’t find one piece of advice on that link which is of any help to people trying to find a partner, and all of it is inappropriate.

I’m a male and I’m 19 years old, I have had a few girlfriends in the past all of which I have learned and experienced from them and I got to know who they are not just bagging them just because they were Christian! I have also abstained from sex in all of those relationships; I see no need to physically harm a mans penis in order to prevent him from having intercourse. If the man loves God truly he will be able to wait until marriage to have sex.

We know it says in the bible that spilling your seed is wrong and that you shouldn’t lust over people.

But if a man wants to masturbate, doing it over Jesus is the most blasphemous thing I can think of it be ‘done over’

An inanimate object would be better rather than the Lord who is perfect and should not be tainted to being Lust over.

Please note - If you do not have the same beliefs as we do, you are going to burn in Hell forever.

Don’t worry, I’m going to heaven and I completely disagree with everything you have on that site, because I know my God and he is loving and amazing in every way and I couldn’t be happier being his son.

Craig Mobey

hi, i recently read your article on the "ICE AGE" movie and how blasphemic it is, i am aware that this article is old, though the words which it shares are still very lively on the page, i would just like to share my understanding of what you have written and say that you are being very critical in your approach to assessing this movie, also, many of the sources you have used for evidence are rather vague and are taken too literal... if you would like to engage in a friendly exchange of knowledge, i would be happy to through email, i would also like to here what you have to say in reference to my words. By the way, i am a faithful Christian therefore i do believe in the Bible and the words of Jesus.

DaZZa mootorhead

to whom it may concern,

Im the outreach director at my church and also the backup sunday school teacher, im wondering is it christian to be in the kkk like ya"ll? i think not . it is you weak people that hide behind wal-mart bed sheets that give real baptist christians like me a bad name. When and who made ya"ll the authority? maybe you cowards will read what the Bible says about hate. get a life and get saved.

shane Gray

Good afternoon,

I have seen your site, and It did made me sad, because I know that you are doing something that’s not healthy for the humanity. The Bible shows that we must be serious about the things of God. Please, open your eyes for what Jesus wants to tell and show you. I’m so sorry about my form of language, because I’m still learning English.

That’s it, be careful and happy under the wings of God! Jesus loves you!


i just read your article on wiccans i must say that you people are the ones that sound like satanists. I used to be a christian, but now im a wiccan. For your information. anybody can be a wiccan even a police officer or a docter. wicca isnt a fashion statement and secondly wicca has nothing to do with the devil. the devil is your world not ours. wicca is about healing and helping people you racist pig. you make me sick. wicca has a rule and that is you never harm another person no matter what weather with magic or with you fist or anything else or it will came back at you 3 times as bad. you people know nothing. plus your jesus christ would never be so intolerent of other people. if i recall my scriptures correctly he even sat and ate with sinners and pagens, so dont you be going around telling people that we are evil and we need to be out lawed. your jesus would never be so cruel and if you ask any wiccan they will tell you that wicca is NOT evil you racist pig!!!!! As much as i dont like you i will pray to the goddess to help you.

Micahael Canton

Hi you mother fucking besmirched sluts! I'd watch those prodigious cocks of yours... they are puttering with your intellectual perforation.

I'm sure you know why I'm e-mailing you. Me, as well as millions of other people, have found your website appalling. Some articles are quite hilarious, while others are just horrible! It's nice to see that we have a few daring shitholes like Landover on this Earth; gives me someone to bash. *smiles*

So I know you guys are aware that you are all mentally retarded. I know you've realized this, but when I visited your 'godly-site', a pornography advertisement popped up!!! Some Christians you guys are; just a bunch of pervertet loosers. And of course, all your going to do is laugh at my e-mail and say 'look at another helpless American citizen criticising us!"

Well I'm sure you'll be laughing when I tell Anonymus about your religion. That's right, Anonymus; the very ones that are bashing Scientology, and the very ones who can destroy a website in under a minuet!

Have fun in hell,


Rick Charles

PS - Fuck you. All the pastors of your phony 'Landover' Baptist Church are gay cock-suckers! Yea, that's right! Anonymous has something against Scientology... but they should attack YOU guys and all your FUCKING fake news articles!

How stupid are you people? I read all your idiot comments and do and donts, for making sure your child wont turn up gay, are u for real?

That has got to be the stupidest thing ive ever read in my whole life! Suspicious crayons? 3” inches away? No cartoons? Eat foods that smell like vaginas?

You must be inbreeds to write such stupid assed stuff! And to post it no less! You call yourself a pastor? How about calling yourself an IDIOT! Making your boy call you mommy dearest is surely a good way to raise a Sissy!

You people are in serious need of help, and pray to God you have no children

Marie Maltais

This site you have going, though initially based on a good premise, is making Jesus look bad. Please leave the fear and hatred that is the legacy of Satan, and return to the kindness and love of Jesus Christ our Savior. Remember God hates the sin not the sinner, for the sinner He feels pity and remorse that the road they are heading down ends in such a bad way, but always always does He call them back in love. And if they don't come back, don't get into what happens to them, it just turns people off.

All Glory to God,

Lisa Calhoun



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