October 2008

The Latest Product Line From Landover Baptist

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Letters To Landover: "Pastor's Mailbag"

A Small Sample of e-mails unedited and in original form

You have to be joking with this site? beating children? no sex? increasing global warming? if you think this is christianity you are wrong and in your religion your going to hell, big time. I find this site sick! it supports abuse! either you are some cunt playing a trick on gullable christians or your an insane fanatic with the fucking sense of a toddler. take this trash off the internet.

Bethany Pickering

Fortunately, a Catholic can convert a Baptist or any misled Christian in an instant.  When you all finally experience the full truth, you then realize what is missing in your lives.   

I will pray for you and your church and the poor souls in your church.  You are misguided, misinformed and more importantly filled with hate for something you completely do not understand.  

Praying, Lisa

Lisa Grillot

To Whom It May Concern:  

I came across an article that you put out on the web about what wiccans look like.  Well I am not overweight I am not pale complexioned.  We do not have piercing everywhere and  we do not worship satan that is what sadist do not wiccans, there is a difference.  We do not always wear black. We do not kidnap children and drink their blood, we have children of our own, we do not try to convert anyone who does not want to belong. We go to churches too, some of the "witches" or "Unsavory people" as you call them are devoted Catholics too!   I do not know where you are getting your information from.  We do take bathes, wear clean clothes, work jobs and live in the communities like everybody.  We are hardworking tax paying members of society.  

What wiccans or I prefer Pagans is a earth based religion that honors mother earth and everything around us.  Before you start running off at the mouth you should get the facts straight.  

Paganism is one of the oldest religions except Hinduism, so I guess you are going to say that religion is Satanist too.  I have listened to a lot of people talk about religion, and have found out in my 46 years of life that christians are the most hypocritical people alive.  Wiccans for the most part just want to be left alone and to be able to rejoice in their own way.   

I am not trying to convert you, I just think you need to get the facts straight.  

Blessed Be

Faye Goforth
Which witch

please convert your souls to the true religion of CHRIST renounce to your false doctrine and love MARY THE CATHOLIC CHURCH  IS THE ONLY WAY TO SAVE YOUR SOULS. MAY GOD HAVE MERCY UPON YOU

Antonio e Sarah

I am a true christian , and I know that you are not how ever came up with this stupid website. If you was a true christian you know that GOD wants everyone to love everyone. And it says in the bible that you suppose to love everyone even your parents, you do not going around telling young kids to hate there parents. I hope you know that you made me mad for reading what you wrote, and telling the kids to get there parents check book so they could get a playstation that is really stupid to. I hope you know I am in a bad mood now, for reading something stupid like this.


I am writing regarding your article: Back to School Witnessing Tips for Christian Students!   I must say that I am truly appalled that the author of this article contends to be a true Christian & would encourage children to break the laws in the name of Jesus.  I think this is a complete misunderstanding of Jesus' message & I am sure if he were still alive in the flesh that he would take pity on you.  Jesus was nothing more than an enlightened man who charmed the masses with his messages of peace & love and those in power had him killed because his message & presence threatened their existence as they knew it.  Nothing more, nothing less.  

Shame on you.  The Jesus that I have read about would not encourage such judgement.  Jesus believed that all people were good regardless of their sexual preferences, their beliefs or their personal circumstances.  Perhaps the author of this article ought to read the Bible again and obtain a more "accurate" perspective of Jesus' message IF the Bible actually represents Jesus' message that is...  

The author of that article is a truly twisted individual...  


Tara Bourgeois (the Single mother who should burn in hell according to the author and who isn't a Christian, but a Wiccan who flies around on her broom and worships the naked Greek Gods under the full moon in her birthday suit!)  

PS:  I will cast a spell to get those demons out of you now!!!


I've just read an 'interesting' article by Brother Barry Hardwick. I admire him for being devoted to God, very few people are these days. However, I am very deeply offended by his use of the term 'nelly boys'. I am also gravefuly discussed, as God would be also, as you allowed him to make Christianity look such a laughing stock by his very hurtful and sinful comments. My son is a gay man, who leads a perfectly sinless lifestyle. When he came out to me and told me that he was a gay man, I was not upset in the slightest. God loves us for who we are, not what we are and thats a major problem in the Christian community. Many Christians, like Brother Barry, are so wrapped up in their own little lives that they forget to do TRUE Christian work.  Christian work is about helpling other people like it says in the Bible, like helping charity events, help the elderly, disabled and even try and help crime come to a stop. Shouting from the rooftops with his homophobic comments is going to make Brother Barry drive even more people away from the church. Writing articles like the one he wrote as very very outdated and prehistoric views no one is interested in hearing. Times have changed. People have realised that it doesn't matter of your sexual orientation, skin colour or even what sex you are, God loves you for you. It upsets me that there are so many athesits in the world. Speaking to a lot of people, they find the church very old fashioned in it's views (Brother Barry's being the main example) and do not look forward to an after life. I am a Christian man who loves God, as does my son and I know for a fact that he loves us both too, unconditionally. So to end this now, all I asked of you, as does God, stop letting people such as Brother Barry make such ridiculous and outdated homophobic comments on your website. In the end it just makes you look bad.  

Brother Lee McDonald

Hi there.

I have read your archives and things of that such about demonic babies and whatnot, and I honestly have to say that none of that impresses me. And I really think all of you are a bunch of idiots who are going to burn in Hell one day for treating people the way you do. I think that if God intended for people to be the way he wanted them to be, he would have made them that way, not given them a choice. So, you people are full of shit and you really need to take your heads out of your asses and smell the roses and realize that the world is not the perfect place you want it to be and it never will be. Because no matter what, there will always be something wrong with this world. So, why don't you stop being arrogant asses (because that is all you are showing me) and try to act like normal people with jobs who have to actually WORK for a living. Or is that too big of a word for you to understand? Not everything is a sin or involves the Devil or is Lucifer's work, just because you disagree with it or think that it is unpure. And people who prejudge are crazy and really need to be put into a mental hospital. That is God's decision to judge, not yours. And I really think all of you need mental help, because, obviously, you were all deprived of something as children or dropped on your heads when you were babies. So shut the hell up and get the fuck out of people's lives!!! Thank you, and have a lovely day

Natasha Casad-Best

Please remove teachings of condemnation and eternal suffering. They are unnecessary and one of the few reasons hardcore non-believers will never be converted.

Thank you.

Matthew Kestner

This person is as gay as his stupid retarted speech. Who the hell cares what he's got to say. no listens. oh btw. I am a Christian too hello!!!??? And guess what I am from UK.(England) and guess what? in the US , HP is even more popular than here you damn twat! Just get out of YouTube. I hate gays too but this is ridiculous. It's a STORY. = NOT REAL got it???


I have been a Christian for most of my 50 years and I'm sitting here in disbelief that your church would actually BELIEVE that the Big Idea Corporation would market a PENIS for a cucumber to children!  If you ACTUALLY think that this toy is a PENIS, then YOUR mind is in the gutter and YOU NEED TO EXAMINE YOUR THOUGHT LIFE!  It is no more a penis than a real life cucumber could be a penis!  

If you want to slander a Christian themed company such as Big Idea, then you need to examine your motives!  I've loved Veggie Tales since their inception over ten years ago and I raised my kids on them and will raise my grandchildren on them!  In all these years, I"VE NEVER EVEN IMAGINED a cucumber would be a penis!   

THIS IS REPULSIVE and I'm so very THANKFUL I don't go to your church and I pray for the people who DO go there!  Hopefully God will open their eyes to the truth about you and your obsession to slander other Christians!

Thank you for posting you board meetings minutes on the web!!! I am a Christian, Executive Chef and Culinary Arts Instructor from Harrisburg PA working for a Christian 501c3 the feeds 10k children a week in the surrounding communities. You should reconsider posting these board meetings cause they show without a doubt the hypocrisy that exists within your board members and may be dangerous to the mission of the Church. They claim not to be there 'to joke' but 'be serious' and then while accusing a pastor and fellow man of the faith of wrongdoing they joke and laugh. Wow, I read some of your meeting minutes and oh my, you might want to reconsider posting them to the public. Just a suggestion. may the one true God bless you and keep you always in love. Michael

Stefanie Bucher

Dear Pastor,

I ran across your article about children injuring themselves while attempting to masturbate using the Ab toner.  I suggest instead that you turn them on to Onanibics which is a safe and healthy method of exercise. 

Thank you for your time.

-- Best Regards,


Hello, I am interested in purchasing your website landoverbaptist.org and if you want to sell it, please give me your phone number, so I can call you! I have cash to buy today! If you are interested, please reply to [extrated] as soon as possible. Thank you in advance

Forest Leichter

Hello I ran across your website and I am just speechless.  YOU REALLY BUY CHILDREN or is this a bunch of crap?  I can not believe what I saw.  If this site is for real it is the most outrageous, ridiculous, and plain evil doings in my opinion.  From the very moment I landed on your site I could abdoluyrly not believe my eyes.  What type of religion can you be offering to buy kids.  You so bluntly and unbelievably actually say “say goodbye to your kids” What in God’s name are you doing.  I am beyond words.  I don’t know what in the world to think about your site.  Please tell me it is a joke.  You speak very negatively about black children and you compare worth between black and white?  You say you pay 1200.00 for a black child but yet you pay 18000 for a white child.  What the hell is that?  Tell me your religion so that I may NEVER get involved in it.  I am speechless.  What you are doing is not only inhuman, cruel, greedy, stupid, evil, unbelievable, not to mention sickening.  Are you for real, because if you are I am absolutely appalled and offended by site I get nauseas every time I think about what I was reading. 

It seems that you exploiting innocent children and if I can I am going to shut you down.  What you are doing is wrong.  Sure you paint a pretty picture and use God as your reasoning for this terrible thing you are doing I personally am sick to death about what you are doing.  It seems to me that you are buying children for sick sexual purposes or something.  I don’t know what your deal is but you make me want to puke.  Who in the hell would really actually sell their child.  Are they really those kind of sick people in this world that would actually fall for your bullshit.  You say that you have 1400 already and you are looking for more.  This seems to be some type of sadistic sickening cult devil worshiping assholes that are willing to pay for young children.  Are you using them for your sick minds for sexual purposes or what?  You are doing something that is absolutely and positively sickening to my stomach.  You should be turned over to the FEDS and checked and investigated about what you are doing and you the audacity to use God in your ring of sick doings.  Surely you have been contacted by someone already that is a real Christian and not a devil worshiper like you are.  I am going to turn your website over to someone who can get to the bottom of what you are doing.  It seems to me to be a illegal thing you are doing.  You and all your clients that you claim “sold” their own flesh and blood are sick and demented and unbelievable. 

You may be offended by my email but I can give a rat’s ass, your site offends me highly and to no end and makes me terribly ashamed to even be in the white race with you and people like you should be locked away with people just like you and exploited the same way.  You are sick.

I am hoping that this website is a joke, I really am.  I am without words about your site.  I am so outraged, if this is for real, that people would actually even consider selling their children and even more outraged that you buy them.  You say that when they get 13 that they are old enough to be on their own that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard in my life of 42 years!!!!!!  At 13 they are still just children.  They cant work, they cant drive, they cant vote, they cant rent a place, they cant do anything at that age and you stating what you do about them at 13 is stupid.  Also you say you send them to a hostile third world country, what the shit is that?   You also are very boldly stating that they are write offs for you.  This is very sick.  Then you call the people who email you “stupid”.  You got some nerve I will tell you that and you are making fun of God with your site.  You have the nerve to reference God in this sick ring of children exploitation and claim yourselves to be soldiers of Christ.  You will burn in hell. 

Its not enough that you are using Christ our Lord as the heart of your sickness, you also compare the worth of men versus women and black versus white and this is a unbelievable and most ignorant thing you could ever say.  God made us all equal and yes the woman is supposed to be submissive and obey her husband but I don’t remember anywhere in the bible that its compares the worth of any human being.  If we all in this world were given amounts that we are worth, then you are way in the red so you need to catch up.  If I as a woman am worth lets say 20000 and men are worth more, you are millions in the red you jackasses.  You make me sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By the way, I copied and pasted the following directly from your site:  all of the money we make from your stupidity belongs to our Godly Pastor, Deacon Fred!  Praise Jesus! 

You honestly consider yourselves “GODLY”???????  You should be ashamed!!!!!!!

Tabatha Delgado

I believe in free speech, and I believe we all the right to believe what we want. What I don’t believe or accept is taking Gods Word and twisting it. To say a person who lives a Vegan lifestyle is a witch is so unbelievable I can not believe your pastor said it and you posted it on your web site. I am a "born again" "spirit filled" Christian, and I have found plenty in the Bible to teach that a life free of eating meat is both healthy and what God wants and prefers for his people. I am a Vegan and in no way one of is little creepy witches or misled satan worshipping wiccans as they are known today that he describes. If making eating meat and being a glutton and being enormously obese is his way of showing the world what a great way the Christian life is, I truly pray God brings him to senses before he embarrasses himself and Christians more than he already has. Secondly, if the pastor is going to bash animal loving people who prefer not to kill other creatures and eat them, that is his right, but truthfully, he needs to lose a few hundred pound first. It is definitely against Gods word to be a glutton  and he obviously is sinning in that respect.

JulieAnn Jazserdin

I stumbled across your webpage looking for a costume from DISNEY'S TOY STORY 2 for my 4 year old. NEVER in all my life have I been so appalled to see you people calling yourselves Christians!!! Do you really think judging people is the CHRISTIAN way?? I always thought God judged us all in the end, and I feel pity for you all. I shall pray for you. You need to stop worrying about the petty things like Disney movies, and even the natural things like breast feeding, and worry about where our world is going. If you haven't noticed... We're coming of the ages that are in the Revolations!!! You people really make me sick, and more importantly, you're giving Christians a bad name. Sorry to be so rude, but I'm speaking how I feel. So, if you would like, I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO WRITE A BOOK, AND MAKE ALL KINDS OF MONEY.... PLEASE, I BEG YOU TO INCLUDE MY EMAIL... FREE OF CHARGE!!!

Kristina Estep

no animals in heaven /who are you to tell a eight year old that dogs go to hell to be eaten by chinese.every who wrote that needs to check up on his salvation

Rebornandchanged@ao[last letter extracted].com

I was reading material on your website and for the most part I like it and found it very spiritually uplifting and Bible Based.  I have a concern about someone saying they auction off things on ebay they find in World of Warcraft for real money and then put that money in the offering plate.  That’s against the rules and can get them banned.  Seems that makes as much sense as someone finding a can of beer and then selling it and putting the money in the offering plate, the ends do not always justify the means.  As I said I agree with you on many things but not all and there is room for that in the body of Christ.  Just don’t want to see Christians making their own rules here.  We don’t win anyone to Jesus if we get banned.

Bret Taylor

I would like to know what kind of  christians you call yourselves.  I was reading your forums about praying for sarah palin and I think it is terrible to pray that her daughter will have a miscarrage.and calling her son a tard.  This is not very good christian attitudes.






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