June 2009

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Letters To Landover:
Pastor's Mailbag!

MAY 2009
A Small Sample of E-mails received this month.
Unedited and in original form

To Whom It May Concern:  

This is one of the most evil and disgusting sites I have ever seen. You ought to be ashamed of yourselves for all of the ungodliness found on this filth site. Ordinarily I apply this rule here for such garbage, (Proverbs 26:4), and don't even bother to dignify such arrogance and tomfoolery with an answer for such as is found on your site, but then I thought I might as well answer you with the alternative verse, (Proverbs 26:5). In other words there is a time to be silent and there is time to respond!  

How dare you attack our Lord Jesus Christ in such a way as this!      

Charles & Oleen Tinsley, Missionaries
CY - 3082 Limassol

Dear Pastor,       

I am very disturbed by the way you inform someone when they answer one of your questions wrong.  It makes me not want to awswe or take the quizes you make available.  Telling someone they are a moron is just not right, you could just say wrong,  I probably will not take one of your quizes again and I will tell my friends not to either.   Not happy in Minnesota.    

Donella Drossi


Greetings to you through Christ's name.  

I have filled out funding form for US depart Of faith. I am sure you have seen it.  

it this initiative stil working?.  

i am here in the USA at present and will be leaving for Kenya in July.  

I would like to meet with you and duscuss certain pertinent issues about the church in Kenya.  

May God bless you.  

Bishop Imoite Papa

I am shocked by your horrendous website. You are shocking. You managed to slander sponge bob. Seriously. What the hell. Do you think nickelodeon has had enough of your shit? I can berely discribe the shit on your website. Alienating the minds of poeple. Respect peoples rights to be able to beleive in different things. I personally am athiast, and your preaching a message that even your so-called God doesn't beleive in. Nice one!

Braden Harley

You stupid mother fuckers!!!!!!!!!!!!


Dear sir,

Please take the time to read my response, as I took the time to read your article about the JAR JAR BINKS TOY.

Are you serious?? You want America to BAN these toys because some twisted children were putting their penis inside of it? That's not the toy manufacturers fault. That is the fault of the weird individual who starts putting their penis inside of a RUBBER TOY. That's absurd. There are apparently some weird people in the world who choose to put their penis inside of Vaccuum cleaners and other things of this nature.. But, that doesn't mean that we should BAN vaccuum cleaners, and come up with a fictional theory about how they have sexy spokeswomen and secretly want to seduce you into putting your penis inside of it!

The rationale behind your statement is preposterous. If a parent finds their child inserting their penis into a toy, they need to make sure to explain to their children that it isn't a regular thing, and that they should never attempt to do such a thing again. NOT come up with crazy stories in their heads about how the company must have secretly planned on wanting their children to masturbate with their toys... Again, if some weird kid wants to place his penis inside of something, he will FIND something to put his penis inside of... And, I'm sure you would try and BAN that object as well instead of educating the boy.

And you have to ask yourselves what a toy making company would have to gain by selling masturbation toys to children.. NOTHING. The kids would want to buy the JAR JAR BINKS toy regardless! Not only that, the theory of it is absurd...

Just consider it, and don't e-mail me back in anger. I'm just asking you to shift your viewpoint to a REALITY based ground.


Evan Gooch

what a sick, sick people are you? a woman is less worth than a man and "negroes" have smaller brains???!!!! please tell me it`s some kind of a cruel joke or that you`re all in jail already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maggie Bluewin

YOu guys are hateful Christians. God hates people like you, who think that they are better than anyone else. My late brother was a gay guy and he COMMITTED SUICIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The more you bully people, the more you'll hurt them. Please, tear down this website. why are you so cruel to gays and blacks and everybody

Andrew Quintana  

I recently read an article about Spongebob on your website.  I do agree that it has some questionable content, and I am surprised that it has been consistently popular over the past ten years.  But, the person also mentioned in one part of the paragraph that when he noticed his grandson watching it, he flung him by his hair and beat him.  I think that was a bit too much. Also, how is watching asians getting blown up on the news holy?  That whole sentence seemed a little racist.  I know everyone is capable of good and bad, but that paragraph just bothered me a little.  I don't want to step on anybodies' toes,  I just wanted to state my opinion.  I do partly agree with the whole Spongebob stuff, though.

Thank you for reading this.

Kimberly Adams

I am writing a response to one of your recent articles, titled “God has Zero Tolerance for Wicca!” After reading this article I simply would like to place my beliefs. to whoever may share such a vulgar opinion. I know very well that this letter will have little or no impact on any in agreement but I see fit to state what I believe to be true and not, in this article.

Some I can see have already taken on the role of God, wait, that’s not right? Of course it’s not! No one, and I repeat No one has the right to take judgment on others for that is the role of God, if God can see everything, is everywhere , then he knows what is right and what is wrong. It is him and him alone who should have the right to punish those he sees fit to be punished in whatever mysterious way he should decide.

As a Christian myself I am frankly ashamed of those such as “Pastor Deacon Fred”. And God will see fit that he gets what he deserves, I, of course know that God should be the one to decide weither a punishment is necessary. Of course I am not saying I Know he is wrong I can’t say for sure but there is much I do know, I’ve studied Christian my whole life and I have researched Wicca to a large extent. This so called “Pastor” has discriminated the appearance of others, God sees beauty in all, to him we are all beautiful, all children of God. This is what I’ve been thought, and if you say that it is wrong, well then I’m confused, what is true then. If what I’ve been thought my whole life is a lie, then what of my beliefs? Are they simply lies as well?

If God where to punish all that we have done wrong, then we would no longer have free will. I believe free will is the greatest gift God has given us. Pastor Deacon is trying to discriminate others and take there free will to decide what they want, what they believe, Pastor Deacon wants to take away our free will, And what have you to say of that? If you are not entangled in his lies to a ridiculous extent, then you would be rendered speechless, for deep down you would this to be true. If you are not a heartless wretch, then listen to your heart and you will know, God is there.

"You'll know when you stumble upon gooey pile of stinky Wicca dung! There is not enough turpentine in this county to wash their godless poop from the soles of our expensive shoes!” (Pastor Deacons very words) What is that? “From our expensive shoes” ! This is Absurd! He refers to himself as greater than others, is that the way of God? Wicca is but another form offered for those who find the exact words of the bible hard to believe. At least they believe in a God, isn’t that what counts. God shows himself in many forms to aid those who find one specific religion hard to believe. For your information, Wicca’s Do not believe there is a being so evil so corrupted as Satan. They believe that all beings are good inside or simply gravely confused. Those who harm any other living creatures are not truly following the Wicca way, there are other religions such as Satanism; But Wicca is for those in tune with there Spirituality, the earth and those around them. Wicca’s are of a loving nature that cares for the earth and some may clame to be Wicca and do horrible things, but how do you know it is not simply some one trying to mare the reputation of Wicca? You don’t know! That’s right! There is no way to Know! I would Never Ever in my life follow one such as Pastor Deacon and others who think like him. If one of our Pastors is so corrupted like this, then what does that say about our religion? This very situation enrages me to the point of writing this letter.

"If you see anyone engaging in these activities, you have Jesus' permission to fire a warning round of buckshot into the hiney of the nearest gelatinous glob of cellulite sacrilege you see! (But don't aim for Sister Hardwick!  She's on God's team!)," My, my, that’s just horrible. “But don’t aim for sister Hardwick” Is that supposed to be funny? Well it’s not. Making jokes of killing others simply because of what they believe in. Do you know what’s scary? That he’s comfortable enough to make jokes of death! To make light of a grim situation, or rather monstrous situation! How can you think of killing so many and make light of the fact? This is a Pastor! What of the other Pastors can they do the same? If every pastor did this world wide, half the world would be dead for the simple fact of who they are, what they look like, and what they believe.

Wicca’s to gathering to perform there form of prayer in group, not to sacrifice things. There goal is to better connect with there God, and for all we know could be another form of our God. I conclude this email with the short message that, God works in mysterious ways, he can be anyone, anywhere, anytime. I would think Pastors would know this but perhaps they got the message of God wrong, or maybe they just didn’t study enough. I strongly suggest they go back to there studies if acting the role of God is what they think is right.

Cecile Paquette

Your answer to the 8 year old girl grieving over a deceased pet was AWFUL. You should not be a pastor.  Screw you.

Ron Gunter

I just read your article on Star Trek and Klingons as they relate to the faith of Islam.  

I can honestly say you are about as qualified to draw interpretations on what a made-up TV show is all about, as you are your religion.  

If anything, early Klingons were more similar to Spanish Conquistadors. However, debating a made-up TV show, is like debating a made-up religion.  

John Kanash

I am a Cristian and have been raised that way, as well as my parents and their parents and so on. By happenstance I found your web-site and read a bit of your articles.

Though I do agree with some of the things that you have written, I do hope that perhaps I have been had, and this site is a joke that I perhaps am not getting. I found your article about Praying in Public loudly, missed the point in which Jesus was trying to say. He said to NOT pray so that everyone can see and hear you and know that you are a Christan. NOT to say that you should hide your faith, just that when you are praying out loud in public and make a big to do, it is not for the Lord it is for YOU.

Matthew 16-18:

"Moreover, when you fast, do not be like the hypocrites, with a sad countenance. for they disfigure their faces that they may appear to men to be fasting. assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward. "but you, when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face, "so that you do not appear to men to be fasting, but to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly."

Now, does that sound like God was just kidding? I think not. sorry, I don't mean to judge, I was just very sad at the wrong messages that may be send to the people that are only looking for the truth, the way, and the light.

God Bless,

Mrs. Di Anna Lenger




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