Archive by Subject




Subject Archive:  CULTS!

Congregation Stripped Naked in Mormon Underwear Bust!
You folks might be shocked to hear me say this, but before this sermon is over, the Lord Jesus is going to call on me to move with utter chasteness and holiness in personally examining the undergarments of every single good Christian person seated here...
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Landover Ladies Discover Depraved Cult in Utah!
The Mormons, still with plastic smiles on their faces, got up from their chairs and began approaching the ladies. "They were coming at us like zombies in a Halloween movie," noted Mrs. O'Christian. "I could feel Lucifer all around us....
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YOGA: A Religion for Sex Addicts!
"Yoga" is a religion that sprang forth from the corrupt roots of sexual depravity in the 1960's. A time when godless long-haired liberals were running around our country trying to get people to turn their backs on Christ and embrace other made-up religions...
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WICCA: Intoxicated by Christian Blood!
In an act that can only be described as pure evil, a rabid young Wiccan girl wearing a black cape burst into the Landover Baptist 11 a.m. Sunday morning church service and flung the bloody carcass of a headless...
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Missing Mormons
This announcement is required by Federal Law, If you have any information that would help Federal authorities in their investigation to locate...
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Pokemon? Poke Yourself, Satan!
To drive home his point, Richards burned Pokemon trading cards and video games with a blowtorch and skewered 14 plastic Pokemon action figures with a 40 inch broad sword. Richards then held the sword with all 14 pierced Pokemon figures over a charcoal grill....
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WWF: A Hotbed of Latent Homosexuality!
These sweaty men in tight women’s underwear who can’t keep their hands off each other  may be fooling the unsaved world, but they're not fooling Jesus...
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Baptist Ladies Ambush Frumpy Pentecostals With Emergency Makeovers
"These Pentecostal nuts have it in their heads that the Bible tells them not to shave any hair on their body," said Judy O'Christian, who was placed in charge of the critical "Mustache-Bleaching" operation....
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Jimmy Carter's Habitat for Heathens!
If there is one thing in this world that is worse than a Democrat, it is a Democrat who claims to be a Christian.  These people may attend a Baptist church and carry around a KJV Bible, but in the end...
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Allah is NOT God!
Most members of this congregation have never seen a Mooslim in person. You've seen them on the news, blowing up buildings, and in movies, stealing babies and killing Christians. I've seen...
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WWF Uses Bible as Guide for Treatment of Women
WWF is very serious about teaching Godly basics when it comes to the role of women. In a recent show, a young lady was brought on stage and told to bark like a dog...
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Suffer Not a Witch to Live! 
It's been 20 years since we legally executed a witch on this campus, but our lawyers are working very hard with the Federal Government to ensure that we can continue to practice our religion the way the Bible tells us...
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Occult Practices in the Modern Church
These cults masquerade themselves under the guise of pseudo-religion. Pseudo-religions are made up of groups like; Catho-licks, Mormons, Jee-hovy Witnesses, Unitarians, and various Protestant...
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WNBA: Wannabe Nasty Boys Association
These are the women who have defied God and declined to serve men, instead engaging in sexual activity with each other. Granted, that, too, can sometimes serve the sexual needs...
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Freakylinks: A Sissy's Version of God's Menacing Horrors!
Instead of turning to the Holy Bible to find out how the ever resourceful Lord dismembers and hacks to pieces His beloved children that rub Him the wrong way, kids are turning to cheap imitations...
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Landover Calls for Shutdown of Shameless "Adult Christianity" Web Site
It has been documented by reliable sources that former crack whore, Poppy Dixon first started toying with the idea for 'Adult Christianity' while she was under the care of Devil loving nuns, recovering from a 12 day drinking binge at a...
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Pastor Deacon Fred Leads 3,000 Atheists to Christ at Godless March on Washington [Includes Video of Live Event]
I’d ask you to pull out your bibles, but with this crowd, I bet you took all the Gideon Bibles out of your hotel rooms like good little atheists and threw them down the laundry chute!...
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