July 2006

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Letters To Landover: Pastor's Mailbag

JULY 2006
A Small Sample of e-mails unedited and in original form

To whom it may concern,

Please pull your site off the internet: Please get right w/ God! He still loves you.

Praying For You.


your beautiful website inspired me!


oh, good lord. where to begin?

yes: We are NOT Negroes, we are not Colored--do we look like a load of laundry to you? Last time i checked the closest i looked to being a load of laundry was my clothes. We are A: Black --(black is bad. bad is good. some ppl might still get offended. We are B: AFRICAN-AMERICAN!! oh yes. we can't really chose what color we are. and since it seems to me that every white person i know wants a tan--i like my color. what--you have something against navajo's and asians and other people 'cause they were born different than you?

And yes--as you talk about The Incredibles with people wearing skanky outfits? Take a look at your 'Jesus Thongs' and 'Sexy Campus gear' or whatever the crap that is. 

Courtney Downey

What is with you people? You guys are obviously whacked out of your minds if you take the time to actually find something perverted or satanic in EVERY LITTLE THING YOU FIND. And oh... OHHHHH, bashing the Japanese for making Pokemon. What is that?!??! I am IN LOVE with the Japanese culture (oh, and I suppose you guys are gonna find some little perverted thing in that, huh?) and I see nothing wrong with it! It's cute! And the Aquapets thing... I don't exactly know what that is, but I'll look it up... and you try and ban it because it looks like a phallus. Oh, and SPONGEBOB??? I could NOT STOP LAUGHING at THAT piece. I mean geez. I hope that the creator of Spongebob Squarepants stumbles across this place and sues your ass for that, kitkats. And I really love the fact that you people actually beat up your own children for watching Spongebob. And if you couldn't tell, I was being sarcastic. And the Veggie Tales thing! Yeah. Perfect. Busting into daycare centers like crazies and kicking the toys out of the kid's hands. NICE. Way to go. And I'm pretty sure about that thing with the antenna going up was just a coincidence, I'm pretty sure. Yeah. A COINCIDENCE. The kids in the back of the car were innocently talking about Pokemon, and just because the antenna went up, the fool has to force his kids to watch him run over the figurines? Wow. Yeah. That's really good parenting, yeah. Not. Oh and yeah. Preventing a little boy from turning 'sissy'??? I mean, geez! What the hell is that? Yeah, I said that. What are ya gonna do? XD If I have a son, I'm not going to bash his ass for playing tag or hopscotch on the playground. And not wanting him to play with dolls?? Okay, Barbie dolls, maybe not. But what about those action figures of superheroes? What about THOSE, huh??? Yoicks. You people are seriously touched in the head. And finding porn in the movie Dinosaur... Um, no. Where is it that's pornographic? I may have not seen that movie in a while, but I think I know pornography when I see it. Yeah. And on a closing note, "The Unsaved are Not Welcome"? Yeah. I'm unsaved, and yet I look at and make fun of your website on my online blog. Hah hah hah. How about that?

See you on the other side.

Neko Koneko

Hey, I've been looking at you're "cristian" website for a while and it truly makes me sick.. I won't even bother listing all the ungodly things in you're so called godly website because I might as well just send you you're website back to ya. Anyways, I was pretty patient with you but you're article about the "sex - free" bible is completely wrong and very poorly thought out. The Bible clearly states that you cannot add or take away from the Word of God and you're taking away what God has said. If God did not want children to read and hear about those certain parts of the scripture, would'nt ya think he would have created a new book just for them...well he did'nt. Children, as long as they can read or listen should be tought the whole Word and nothing less, they should be tought what these things are so that they can know what to be aware of when they go out in the world by thenselves. I hope and pray you are at least reading this and will take this to heart and learn what it is to be a true Christian.


you're a disgrace and an embarrasment to Christ and His community...

Sarah Sanchez

You people are not the people of god. do not call yourself christians your making the real christians look bad! why are you selling children? you dont know god!! shut the hell up with all this nonsense your just doiing it for the money!! I HOPE YOU ROT IN HELL!!!!!

Mrs. Amendaly Brasil

I wonder, do all of the parishioners of your church share the opinions displayed on your church's web site? I realize just how misguided the entire Baptist religion is, however, your church takes ignorance to a whole new level. "The unsaved are not welcome", with the s in unsaved crossed through with a dollar symbol? How does one respond to something so completely ludicrous? I want desperately to tell you exactly how I feel about your web site, however, my sane, better judgement prohibits me from doing so. Shame on you all! People like you are the reason I do not proclaim any religion. You truly make me sick.


What type of Christian apparel are you exploiting? Do you realize there are thousands of teenagers and young girls who will view this? If they are a true Christian, why do they need THIS to keep them away from "pesky penises" )by the way, you spelled Penises wrongly -- get a dictionary or better yet, a Bible and an education) On top of everything else (no pun intended), you have a photo of the Sacred Heart of Jesus on underwear......you are sick, and it is highly embarassing, I'm sure, to the Baptist church to have your website available with their name attached to it -- Don't you guys believe in water baptism for the sole forgiveness of sins? Maybe your ad shows you just how WRONG you really are. SICK....SICK....SICK! I, personally, will tell my Christian friends NEVER to purchase from your website

Debbe Leone

aka CelticPrincess

I'm sorry if you have ever been hurt by someone who calls themself a Christian. I can not really offer any condolences other than to say that I would die to make it up to you and show you that some people just get it wrong. I am not shocked by this web site, but I am completely and utterly sorry from the depths of my being for those who have done you wrong in painting a bad picture of a redeeming love.

This may sound like ramblings of a foolish man.

Well, I am a foolish man, but one thing that can not be taken from me [that is offered to anyone who searches for it] is a heart of compassion.

I beg you for your mercy.


Mrs. Betty Bowers Responds: "Next Tuesday will work well for us dear."

every thing yall say on that pice of shit website is just wrong im fuckin surprised that god dose not smite u down at this very moment what the fuck where yall thinking u mock the rilligion u susposedly love and the man u pray to and worship i make want to barf in some fucking tin foil and eat it

Justin Leonard

Not that your going to care, but its just candy. What kind of mother faints to that? lol. Besides there are a million other "demon" candys out there that you could've choosen from. Dangerous??? In what way??? With a box of nerds, the kid could practically choke to death. Why didn't you guys attack the juice popcicle that looks like a penis? And America isn't shocked. Why would they be shocked? There are worse things on TV. Oh well. Respond back if you like.

Andrew Guillen

Hello Pastor, my name is Ann Revello. I was concerned after reading the article on your site with the title "Is My Little Baby Going to Go Gay·. I am a chistian, and i got scared after reading it. I printed the whole article and showed it to the principal priest of my church and he organized a meeting of the town and even talked about it in the Sunday morning preach . No one could believe somebody who claimed to believe in God dared to write such a thing that only inspires hate and ignorance. I am so sorry but like the catholic priest of Montejo de Tiermes Church, in Soria, Spain said, you all are going to hell. And Satan is gonna spit on your faces, you are all already cursed. We are sorry you are so blind you want to expand that twsied and perverted mind of you, damned Baptists. The town of Soria and myself wish you a bad day, and hope someday you rot in hell. By the way, you are probably gay yourself.


I am a bit curious as to how the landover ministry goes about spreading the good-word of christ to non-believers when you seem to condemn them from ever having a place in heaven at all. I have been perusing your site today and found nothing in regards to ministering to those who need it the most: the unbelievers. as we all know, Jesus came to cure the sick, not the healthy, so why does there seem to be so little emphasis on aiding the spiritually sick from your community?

thank you for the clarification,

an inquisitive christian

Matt Jakstis

I read the article on the flying dinosaurs and Noah's ark. Now I am a creationist and a former evolutionist who is working on a biology degree. There are many problems with the article from a creation science point of view. The first problem is that the dinosaur bones currently being found in China have been a very big problem for scientists because they are commonly turning out to be hoaxes. National geographic has published many articles on the subject of "feathered dinosaurs" but when one reads the fine print he sees that what they found were "hairlike structures" that were thought to be "proto-feathers" by evolutionists. In addition these "hairlike structures" are identical to fossilized plants that we find so a more reasonable conclusion would be that the animal died and plants began to grow on the dead carcass.

There are many problems with the article itself besides the dinosaurs. Noah and his family were only required to bring every "kind" of animal on the ark. In genesis it says that God created them to bring forth after their kinds. The biblical "kind" and scientific term "species" are two different things. The term species is meant to be very specific in terms of classification. For example dogs and wolves can reproduce together and produce fertile offspring just fine, but they are considered a separate species because they have some unique behavioral patterns and slight differences in physiology, but mainly because humans generally do not allow cross-breeding between dog and wolf populations. The dogs and wolves, however, are the same "kind" because they can bring forth together. In reality Noah would probably only have had to bring a few thousand pairs onto the ark. The Bible also says that only animals with the breath of life in their nostrils were required on the ark. This means that land animals with nostrils were brought, and Noah would obviously not be required to bring fish onto the Ark (they will be fine if the world becomes covered in water, obviously). The part about bringing animals from Australia did not rub well with me because before the flood, most of the currently ocean water was underground and the water on the Earth were gathered to one place. At the end of the flood God made the mountains rise and he lowered the valleys (the continents were being brought up out of the oceans).

On a personal note. As a former evolutionist, if someone had given me that particular article a few years ago, I would probably never have become a creationist or a true Christian. If you were to use articles on the bacterial flagellum or the bombardier beetle then an evolutionist would be more likely to listen. This particular article really would be a turn off to any evolutionist who reads it. The best way to catch a fish is with good bait, and the best way to hook an evolutionist on God is with good scientific questions and evidence. Scientists like to think, they like to say "Well this certainly opens up a door of possibilities. This looks like it could have been designed, but who could the designer be? Is it robots, aliens, gods, humans from the future, Krishna, Allah, the God of the Bible...?" Once you open up the wonderland of possibilities then they start considering different perspectives and at least for me, the other Holy books were a joke compared to the Bible.

Here are a few web sites with articles that I did enjoy and many which I would have abandoned evolution on the spot had I been given them a few years ago. Answersingenesis.org and ICR.org


You folks need to stop doing an injustice to those who actually are trying to live a decent, righteous and holy life, consecrated to God and the Savior by taking your site off the web. It is obvious that your lives are so degraded with anger and bitterness to fundamentalists that you have devoted much of your lives to mocking real fundamental Christianity.

Take your hearts and truly look to the word of God. I strongly urge you to repent and ask for God's forgiveness for your blasphemous website and the harbored feelings that have generated such foolishness. Actually, I find it hard to believe that a truly born-again believer can come up with such filth; so before you repent of the previously mentioned, just repent for your unsaved soul.

Jason Fultz

Someone has possessed a friend of mine, and I don't know how to help him anymore. I figured I could do this on my own. This demon would be the third demon I have destroyed. But I can't find anything about him, and I can't get him to talk. Its almost like he knows about me. Know my ways of doing things, and its almost like hes playing a game with me to see how long it will take me to figure him out and kill him, and I have this funny feeling that as soon as I figure him out he will kill my friend. I need some help. And no this isn't a joke. I'm seriously in great need of help from someone. So please...help me.


Vicky Short

You people are so stupid. I cannot believe there are stupid indiviuals like you out there. I am a mixed girl, my mother's white dad is mixed with white and black, you brought my mother to tears when she read about selling kids. You stupid retarded pieces of shit, all that stuff about black people I read on your bullshit as website. Pastor how the hell did your stupid ass graduate from anybody's school and anybody's college. I hope to hell you and everyone who believes exactly as you assholes do burn forever in hell. I pray you ignorant racist trailor park trash fools smarten up. Lastly that part about Negroes stealing Razr phones please every black person (because no one says Negroes you ignorant people) in there probably could kick your stupid fat white ass pastor and they really should have. Yeah I seen a picture of you you fat tub of lard, and anyone who follows you and are truly just plain retarded. I would truly like you to respond back you retard fat shit head you and you people need to go straight to hell no matter of fact you people are going to go to hell. And I really can't wait to see the face on you when the devils comes to shake your hand and says hey brother.!!

Manuela Santos

Hello, I am sending this email to you regarding your article on the "Ramadan Diet." I am Muslim and was completely digusted and angry about this article. Here in America , we constantly here about how the Muslims are brainwashing their children yet this article is an example of brainwashing. All of this information was an absolute lie that was just sent out to brainwash non-Muslims and make them believe that this is religon of Islam and what Muslims believe when in reality it's not. I would like to know who would fool you with information like this and why you would even publish something it. We should try to make peace in our world, not make everyone hate each other.

Hiam O

I'm not going to waste my time complaining about your absurd blasphemy. Satan himself is preaching through the avenue of your "church". Evil Evil people. May God forgive you. Actually, you must repent for forgiveness. I feel sorry for you, and all of your followers.

Shawn R

YOU SUCK!!!! If ANYONE is going to hell it has to be you.




Bre Lute

I am shocked and appalled by your anti-Wicca campaign. I have been informed that your site is a spoof site, but I for one am NOT LAUGHING!!! First and formost, Some people who just browse the internet will not be aware this is a spoof site, and may take it as lisense to carry out hate crimes against Wiccans, do you see the danger in this? To slander the peaceful nature that is Wicca by saying that we"kidnap young Christians to skin them" that we make "Jesus jerky" is pure lunacy. I am sending you this E-mail with peaceful intent, and a wish that we can settle this without a lawsuit for slander, and instigating hate crimes against wiccans! I am 24 years old, and I have been Wiccan since I was 12. I have been beat up, stabbed, shot at, even had a group try to hang me once! That is NOT the Christians way! On what grounds do you think it is ok to advise people to kidnap, wrongly imprison, and torture young men and women who have never even said anything derogatory against your faith. I don't know why you would say that Jesus loves the idea of murdering people, but if it comes down to convert or be murdered via fire. I'll provide the diesel fuel. I am requesting that you remove the entire section regarding Wicca and wiccans from your site, and cease and desist all anti-Wicca speeches, sermons, activities, lectures, advice on capturing, torturing, or killing Wiccans, or anything I missed. Feel free to E-mail me with a peaceful response, if I am misinformed, then accept my humblest apologies.

Ron Sumner



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