Relaxes Negro Admittance Policy
Wednesday evening, Pastor
Deacon Fred sent elderly white church members into a tizzy of profane
catcalls when he announced that Landover Baptist would be admitting
Negroes into the main sanctuary for the first time in history. He
assuaged their fears by confiding that people of color would have
limited access to...
We are standing for the truth
that Negroes can change. If you love someone, you will tell them the
truth. Calling Negro behavior sin, is not anti-Negro, it's
Leaders Fly to Nigeria After receiving Urgent Request for Financial Aid
Pastor Deacon Fred,
along with thousands of other Landover Baptist members, received an
important e-mail message from Basher Mobutu, son of the late President
of Nigeria, Mobutu Sese Seko...
of Africanized Killer Bees Invade Freehold!
Mrs. Alabaster told
reporters, “My blue-eyed, blonde-haired baby, John Jr,. walked in the
house, his upper body swaying side to side, with this swaggering look on
his face and said something like, ‘Yo-yo-yo, ol' Lady, sis and I are
splittin’ this jive...
Harry Discusses Christian Tolerance With a Negro
And how dare you suggest we are
exploiting the Mexicans and Negroes in our employ! Every single
investigation performed by both state and federal entities has uncovered
no evidence of that. Just ask one of our New York Jew lawyers...
to Treat Negroes Like Human Beings
There are large primates that
live on the jungle floor and scare missionaries, who, being Christians,
are armed against them. They are called gorillas. There are even
primates that rob liquor stores, organize marches and attempt to imitate
Christian Heritage Month™: The Lost Treasure of Slavery
I remember I was just starting
out as a young preacher here when federal marshals raided our community
in 1971 and told us that we had to start paying our black servants.
Those were some tough times, my friends. To lose such a...
Game Show Forced to Dumb Down and Make Room For, "Yo, I
Wants To Be Millionaire"
The nation's 33,347,718 Negroes
took enough time away from filling out lottery tickets Monday to file a
class action lawsuit against Disney, parent company of ABC, which
broadcasts the wildly successful "Who Wants to Be a
Millionaire?" The crux of their complaint is that the program
discriminates against blacks by asking questions only people with an
education could be expected to understand...
White; Coby's Black. Case Closed!
It appears that a major figure
in professional basketball who, needless to say, is the Negro, actually
had sex with a little white girl in Colorado [gasps from the
you know that dear...
Negro Falsely Accuses Church of "Racisism"
"The Salvation Security
Act" is a bill intended to save all natural born or naturalized
Americans (unless they are Mexicans who snuck in and are, therefore,
exempt from honoring immigration laws applicable to everyone else)
(hereinafter "Real Americans") from the eternal fires of
certain damnation at the hands of the Lord who loves them
The Landover Board of Deacons
answered this question with a resounding “No” Monday night. As all
church members know, every Monday, the board discusses one of the
seemingly countless inexplicable theological quandaries presented by the
Tribute to Strom Thurmond: The Last True Christian™ Senator
Like Ronald Reagan, he had
unfortunately lost much of his grasp of reality at least a decade before
he retired from politics. But
just as Reagan served our great nation through eight years of dementia,
so, too, Thurmond was ever-present in the....
Stealthily Recruit Innocent Christian Children Into the Negro Lifestyle
American Christian children are being recruited into the Negro lifestyle
faster than Jesse Jackson can make up a new word. Christian
to Require Fidelity of Ex-Ministry Graduates
Robert Wallace (formerly Rufus Washington) was caught in a soul food
convenience store in Chicago. He was spotted by several militant
Negro activists who photographed him. Wallace reported that he had
Ghetto Slang For Murder!
Having never been in a Negro
neighborhood, much less a Negro home, the Ladies had no idea what to
expect --except the worst. After an ear-piercing hour of profane tribal
music, grape soda spritzers made with Thunderbird...
Baby Jesus Shocks White Churchgoers
Indeed, the handsome little
baby Ebby Smith had been replaced with the dark-as-an-eight-ball Ice
"Puffy" Playa Jefferson, a 6 month old Negro child belonging
to maintenance workers, Moesha Lois and Jeremiah Jefferson Sr....