Archive by Subject

Subject Archive:  HOMOSEXUALS

The Homo Handshake
A helpful graphical chart that assists in protecting ignorant Christians from homosexual predators...
Read More>>

Is My Little Baby Going to Go Gay?
Try serving meals that more effectively evoke a hankering for the fragrant delights of the female genitalia. An artichoke stuffed with tuna fish will usually do the trick...
Read More>>

A Right to be Homo: One Giant Leap Down the Slippery Slope to Armageddon!
They used to limit their association to deviant acts in out-of-the-way restrooms, highway rest stops and the places in Catholic churches so synonymous with rectal intercourse they are simply called “rectories.”  Then, in 1969, a few Nancys pointed...
Read More>>

Special Report: The WWF- A Hotbed of Latent Homosexuality
In the case of Mr. Kidwell, Pastor Deacon Fred recalled, "The Holy Ghost living inside of me made it plain and clear that the old coot was chock full of demons! And when the Holy Ghost says, 'JUMP!' boy - you'd better JUMP!"...
Read More>>

Homosexual Reparative: Lisping Surgery
After our doctors have removed the tip of your son's tongue with a pair of household sewing scissors, a roll of paper towels will be used to stop the bleeding.  Expect to see swelling around the lips, and if...
Read More>>

Practicing Greek in Rome: The Link Between Catholicism and Homosexuality
Last week, the Society to Cure Ailing Morality published the results of its six month investigation into the historical and contemporary connection between homosexuality and the Catholic...
Read More>>

Perverted Teacher Turns Kindergarten into Homosexual Training Camp!
"That perverted woman had been trying to corrupt our children right under our noses," noted Ladies of Landover (LOL) president, sister Taffy Crockett.  "She had been trying to turn our boys into disgusting fairies and our girls into feminazi lesbians!"...
Read More>>

BASH: Baptists Are Saving Homosexuals
Visit the one of the most powerful ministries in the world. Owned and operated by Mrs. Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian...
Read More>>

Baptist Scientists Link Rise in Faggotry to "Something Somewhere in the Air Somehow"
Brother Harry's team followed the lives of several Landover members moving out of Iowa, conducted numerous interviews of True Christians living in the devilish towns in which the church members took residence and clicked countless photographs of deviant acts...
Read More>>

No Difference Between Deuteronomy-Mandated Stoning and Pistol Whipping in Wyoming
Am I missing something here, or is the sympathy for Matthew Shepard by people 
claiming to be Christians or Jews the ultimate in hypocrisy?  True Christians believe that every word of the Bible...
Read More>>

Children are Finding Nemo Instead of Finding Jesus and the Homos at Disney are to Blame!
"Walt Disney would be spinning in his grave if he knew his animation studios were full of giggling homosexuals, doodling and talking about silly colors and little fishies for their latest film," said Pastor Deacon Fred last Sunday. "But as we all know, Walt Disney never made it to Heaven...
Read More>>

Homosexuals are Repulsed by Bush
Speakers at a recent “gay pride” celebration were quoted as saying, “Bush stinks,” “Bush is slimy,” and “Every time I see Bush, I get sick to my stomach.” Steve Stouffer, director of the political action...
Read More>>

Christian Movie Goers Beware!  The Two Towers is Homo Slang for Erect Hobbit Penises!
Pastors who were allowed to see the first film, The Fellowship of the Ring, remember that toward the end, one of the male hobbits (which is slang for "homo boy with a little bitty [insert unchristian word here] hanging between his legs") fell so much in love with the main character, Frodo...
Read More>>

Hollywood Theatre Tricks Christian Audiences Into Becoming Homosexuals!
The latest atrocity from Southern California's festering sore on humanity's eyelid is a theatrical production called "Southern Baptist Sissies,"  This disgusting film is a stab in the heart of morality, our once-great...
Read More>>

Homosexual Featured in Oxygen Ad, Church Members Encouraged to Stop Breathing
In order to remain alive, or at least in a temporary stasis, church members will be equipped with state of the art 'oxygen transferal units.' These units will take the filthy, dirty, morally polluted secular air that circles...
Read More>>

Copyright 200
3, Americhrist Ltd. All rights reserved. Terms of Service
The Landover Baptist website is not intended to be viewed by anyone under 18