Civilized Women of God
l
Daisy Mae Johnson

Bible Thumpin' Blonde

In her own words, "I was Born and raised in Freehold, Iowa to a wonderful True Christian™ family. I was home schooled and married at 14 to a very wealthy, much older, True Christian™ gentleman, Brother Milbert Johnson.

Here is Brother Milbert in happier times, on our honeymoon in Hawaii. Doesn't he look happy!

Unfortunately, a few months later I accidentally killed poor Milbert while cleaning his gun. He was bending over giving me Hell about how I wasn't shining the handle properly or something when it went off. It was tragic! Fortunately, I was cleared of all charges. Thank you JESUS (and Pastor Zeke)!

Nine months to the day after we were married, Brother Milbert and I had one son, Tate, but I like to call him Tater, because he's as cute as a little tater bug! Just look at that face! He's such a good boy. He attends Landover Middle School and is in the Young Republican Program.

Pastor Zeke is teaching precious little Tater to be an expert marksman and teaching Tater the fine art of witness and rebuking by taking him along on Friday Stripper Rebuking. Tater just loves something called "Lap Dances for the Lord". Isn't that PRECIOUS!

When I'm not attending GOD'S Favorite Church (LBC of course) I enjoy entering bake-offs and cooking contest. If a lady can't cook a decent pot roast she has no business being a True Christian wife! Here is my last winning entry. GLORY!

Organizing social events, potluck dinners and BBQ's, rebuking sinners, organizing and attending book burnings, shooing demons, singing in the Ladies of Landover Choir, witnessing and throwing bibles at homers, lezbeans and gothtards. I am currently writing a manual on how to be a good True Christian wife

I'm also Freehold's Number One True Christian™ Match Maker. I have personally been responsible for 3 True Christian marriages in the last 2 years. Here is the latest happy couple. Obadiah and Lerlene Scroggins (tin Tithers). Aren't they ADORABLE!"

The Landover Baptist Woman's Association  (Landover Ladies).
Mrs. Betty Bowers
Mrs. Glendora Christianson
Ona Mae Moffett
Daisy Mae Johnson
Mrs. Lavinia Glidewell
Sister Mary Maria 
Mrs. (Suzzanna Beth) Billy Ray Simpkins
Sister Talitha
Lillian Bess Stallcup, CCB
Mrs. Gloria Fundee 
Mrs. Langston May 
Mrs. Satin Macy
Mrs. Pastor Deacon Fred
Mrs. Wilkins
Kathy Anne Hargraves
Mrs. Col. Waters Grisham
Mrs. Ethel Twiddle 
Mrs. Terry Eagleton
Ms. Kitten
Mrs. Dora Denkins (ex-member)
Penny Givens
Mrs.Barbara Entwistle
Tammy Rogers
Mrs. Ted Meadows
Mrs. Filmore Larson
Mrs. Judy Porter
Ms. Anne Thrope
Mrs. John Warner Jr.
Mrs. Singleton Thornhill
Mrs. Thoburn
Ms. Dillard McKray
Ms. Jeremy Field
Mrs. Theodore Kelvin May
Ms. Roxanne Thatch
Mrs. Elmer Balswick
Mrs. Bubba T. Gatlin
Mrs. Geoffrey Weaver

 

 


 

 




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