Church Bulldozes Starving Ethiopian Children Away From Lovely Banquet Area
"The second the chef started loading the banquet table, some of those starving native children would make it past the electric fence and rudely hold their little hands out," said Rev. Stanley. "No one could even finish the first course looking at those gas-filled bellies. They looked like little black bowling balls on sticks. It was disgusting. It is one thing to surprise someone with Christian charity, but when they just stand there expecting it, that really gets under my skin."
Read All About It!>

Special Report: WWF a Hotbed of Latent Homosexuality!

"Before lustful, screaming fans, depraved sissies on steroids flirt with each other, taunt each other, play hard to get, and ultimately allow themselves to be touched in places unthinkable to Christian men."
Landover WWF Exclusive!>

Security Beefed Up Now That Jews Know About Gold Ark
"You wouldn't believe the number of old Rabbis and other cheapskates that are making pilgrimages to this church every day. They just want to catch a glimpse of that old thing!" Said one pastor.
Read the Whole Story>

Film Review: The Patriot
Betty Bowers reviews Hollywood's latest inaccurate piece of anti-Christian trash.
Click Here for Review

Back Issues
Early editions now available online.
May 2000 Edition>
July 2000 Edition>

our christian world

Free Movie Preview!
Real life Christian drama comes to Landover this Fall! Click to see a Flash video preview of our new Television series! (For mature, God fearing audiences only!)
Pummeling, Plagues and Pestilence
Landover Petitions for a Biblical Criminal Code. There is only one cause of crime -- Satan. And there is only going to be one cure -- God's law. The Ten Commandments is just a start!
Read Our Petition!>
Concentration Campus for Divorcees: NO VACANCY!
If we expect the unsaved to live by the Bible, it seemed like a good idea for Christians to finally start doing that, too. And the Bible is clear -- no divorce.
Bible Punishment Quiz (Interactive)
What punishment did God say is mandatory for an unruly child? "Nothing? Stoning to death?" How well do you know God's mandates?
Take the Quiz here>
Bible Miracle On Church Field Trip Leaves Six Children Dead
FREEHOLD IA: Several Landover youths remain in serious condition after what they thought were "harmless taunts" led to a close encounter with Holy Scripture. Deacon Glen Mitchell suffered the indignity of children laughing at his baldness on a recent trip to the Landover Baptist Zoo. He then pointed out some Bible passages from 2nd Kings that convinced the zoo keeper to release the children, unsupervised, into the polar bear exhibit during the bears' feeding time. "Deacon Mitchell didn't have a choice," remarked Pastor Smith. "He was doing what the Bible commanded him to do. This miracle was in God's hands the whole time."
60 Second Sermons In Real Audio ~ Updated 07/31
Pastor Deacon Fred preaches a new 60 Second Sermon every Monday! Listen to this week's sermon: 07/31/00: "Jesus Didn't Destroy The Law!"
Visit the complete sermon archive to get a full dose of hellfire by clicking here>
The New Landover Baptist Store
Purchase a lovely gift or something for yourself at the new Get Your Ass To Church Store. T-shirts, mugs, hats, stickers, sanitary napkins and anything else the Lord tells us to sell!
I want to shop for Jesus!-->
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Q & A With Brother Harry
Known among peers as "The Bible Answer Man," Rev. Hardwick answers your questions and gives Biblical advice on a daily basis.
Talk To Brother Harry Here>
The gospel according to Sister Taffy. Daily Blessings. Womens' Ministries. Don't miss!
Visit SisterTaffy.com>
A Warning to The Unsaved:
We have taken the liberty of requesting a restraining order on all unsaved persons. If you are unsaved, you are not allowed within a 10 mile radius of our church, nor are you allowed on this website. Kindly leave, and be about the Devil's business, for you are not welcome here. Glory!
Read our E-mail here>

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