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Letters To Landover:
Pastor Opens His Mailbag!
READER MAIL SENT TO LANDOVER BAPTIST
DURING THE MONTH OF SEPTEMBER
A Sample of E-mails received.
Unedited and in original form
some review of your website and material found around the net, it astonishes me that you are still breathing.
Although a good Christian will turn a cheek, I suspect that your satire will at some point catch-up with you in a wrath that will be most unpleasant and most likely deliver you to the hell in which seem to so desperately seek to eventually reside in.
You are either very brave, idiotic or simply stupid. Reading some of the emails that you post that you have received, it would appear that satin is working through you to bring out the worse in good Christians. No luck here my friend! Conversely, I hope that you right your wrongs with Christ before one of your enraged readers gets a hold of you.
Find Christ. His love brings more joy than the smirks that satin is providing you in pursuing this spoof.
I am deeply saddened for you.
- Jeffery Boutin is please to inform you that No virus found in this outgoing message.
i accidentally came across your occult oops i mean website and i dont mind telling your for one second that you are some sick sick bastards
you dont actually believe in religion or god its just a front so you can fatten your pockets with peoples money ---- so typical
just remember you too will face a judgement day unfortunately
there is a place for lowlife bastards like yourselfs too
dont bother to respond to this as it will just be deleted without opening it
PLEASE NOTE: "If you send an e-mail submission to this site, you are certifying that you are 18 years or older and you are granting The Landover Baptist™ Parody Website a worldwide, royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable, non-exclusive and fully sublicensable right and license to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, perform and display your submission (in whole or part including your personal e-mail address) and/or to incorporate it in other works in any form, media, or technology now known or later developed." This means, we could write a book and include your email messages and all of the money we make from your stupidity belongs to our Godly Pastor, Deacon Fred! Praise Jesus!"
The above was quoted from your website.
You realize that to modify, or manipulate in any way, then publish, or use such modified/manipulated scripts/messages, whether you profit from it or not, is illegal?
Not to mention, there is quite a bit of slander and deflamation of character on your site as well. If I were you, I would re-word a few things before the people your committing these criminal acts against, decide to bring a suit against you. There is a fine line between freedom of speech, and what it is your doing. Personally, I don't take your site serisously, as it is filled with nothing but judgement (Judge not, least ye be judged), hate (love thy neighbor), and mis-guided attempts to further persecute anyone who does not fit into a TINY little box of your Christian ideals. Anyone with half a brain won't take it seriously.
It will be interesting when you die, and see how wrong you were. No, I am no judging or saying your going to hell, but yea, there is a God. It's great, don't believe me, don't believe in anything, but one day you will know. I feel sorry for you, just as I am sure you feel sorry for a crazy Jesus loving fool like me. But, please before you mock people, and their works such as
the horrid picture that you have up of Beloved Pope John Paul II. Do a little research, and see just how better the world is because he was in it. When you go to bed tonight, ask youself, is the world any better because your here? If no, it's never to late to change that.
You peole fucking make me sick. What is your problem? God doesn't want you to spread hate! You think by shunning and attacking all those who don't believe the way you do is going to get you to heaven? Seriously? God may be vengeful but he is also loving and understanding.
He only gives vengeance where vengance is due! You are poisoning the minds of people world wide. You are making all those who truely belief in god look bad. But it's ok. You will reap what you sew. I just thought you should know that it is indeed all of you who shall burn.
You have taken god's word and twisted it to hurt people who dont deserve it. I know by the things you have said that you do not have god in your heart. All that you have is hate, How does it taste? Bitter? I thought so. Rot in hell.
idiot, why u opened like this web page,. u r making fun & bad thing on lord jesus.
i am warning you,. first close all the negative thing from your web site, you turn a good boy towards lord jesus. you have made heavy sin & wrong thing. still lord jesus will forgive you and accept you. so first pray lord jesus and ask for forgivness, then modify this website to praise the lord.
i am again warning you. this may be the final warning from god by me to you. leave the wrong thing and be a good boy. don't continue this wrong bussiness.
My god still waiting for you- turn to good way. leave satan way and come to jesus way. he is the true god. he is still loving you. and he is living in this world. don't do sin.
take this is the last warning form god. otherwise you will be punished for the sin what u made. finally ask god to forgive and come closer to lord jesus.
Lord Jesus and Mr. Nabi Arthi
The Honorable Elijah Muhammad teaches us that no people on earth fit the Bible's symbolic picture about the Lost Sheep more so than America's twenty million so-called
Negroes and there has never in history been a more vicious and blood-thirsty wolf than the American white man. He teaches us that for four hundred years America has been nothing but a wolves den for twenty million so-called Negroes, twenty million second-class citizens, and this black revolution that is developing against the white wolf today is developing because The Honorable Elijah Muhammad, a godsent shepherd, has opened the eyes of our people. And the black masses can now see that we have all been here in this white doghouse long, too long. The black masses don't want segregation nor do we want integration. What we want is complete separation. In short, we don't want to be integrated with the white man, we want to be separated from the white man. And now our religious leader and teacher, The Honorable Elijah Muhammad, teaches us that this is the only intelligent and lasting solution to the present race problem. In order to fully understand why the Muslim followers of The Honorable Elijah Muhammad actually reject hypocritical promises of integration it must first be understood by every one that we are a religious group, and as a religious group we can in no way be equated or compared to the nonreligious civil rights groups.
Is this for real? This is a very hateful site. Please
spread the word of Jesus not hate. One who judges will be judged on judgement day. Your site makes me so sad for you. Jesus came to earth to save the sinners...please help them, not hate them.
Your store is filled with hate and garbage; please clean it up.
In Gods name,
I am one of those illeged
"Pope-lovin', candle-lighting, ring-kissin' Catholics" Spoken about in the sermon titled "Why do Catholics Worship Mary". Today I ask you to honestly,wholeheartedly seek the truth about Catholicism because everything I read in this sermon was false. Catholics are truly Christian " one LORD,one faith, one baptism". Now I do not know the source from which you gathered this information, but I can assure you that it is false. We do not worship Mary , or believe that a mere man alone has the power to forgive sins but it is Christ who forgives in the person of the priest for it is written " WHOSE SINS YOU FORGIVE ARE FORGIVEN THEM; AND WHOSE SINS YOU RETAIN THEY ARE RETAINED. It is also writen. " YOU ARE PETER ..." matthew. I know that my words alone are not enough to teach you all the truths of Catholicism but I ask you to seek the truth for in seeking you will find . I send you this letter with no anger or hostility for the things written in the sermon though they do strike a very painful nerve. Please research using legitimate sources such as the cable television station EWTN , and other sources . Please do not look at Catholicism with hate but with an open mind that seeks truth. As a pastor you are a man of faith who desires eternal salvation. Rest assured that all baptists and protestants alike will be in my prayers.
God bless pastor my name is Lisbeth Zeno and I am the youth leader at my church, I was nhoping to know if you were able to
send me some of the information you discovered from the spongebob show, because I would love to show it to my youth as well as the kids. I been researching this cartoon and would like to know if you were able to help.
You could send it to my email firstname.lastname@example.org
I am still trying to figure out if this entire site is a joke! The nerve of you assholes to call
Derrick Todd lee a martyr!
You said he was doing gods work... Are u fucking serious??? You also said that women are prone to debauchery simply because they are women and that the victims deserved it?!?!?! I am shocked... Literally speechlesS!
Someone should send Lynne Marino over to rip you idiots a couple new assholes for demons to stick their spiked red penises into!!! There is a warm spot in hell waiting for you.... Hope u burn and may allthe days of your cursed life be filled with the same agony and emptiness that the victims families feel!
Burn in hell,
you are one
thick headed man. you should do your research before you speak your
sarcastic mind. Do you really think god enjoys watching you do what you
do? I hope MOTHER MARRY and ST. PETER have mercy on your soul on
judgement day! ! that is all....
by the way. who started your stupid church? A bunch of ignorant fools!
is your church just an online organization, or are you a
physical church somewhere in the States or elsewhere?