Landover Baptist: Where The Worthwhile Worship. Unsaved Unwelcome.

Dancing In Taliban Blood!
God's 10 secrets for waging the perfect war.
Click Here To View God's Secrets!>

Childcare Action Alert!
Jewish Actor, Billy Crystal, Plays Talking Testicle In New Disney Film! Click Here For Details!>

Laura Bush's Radio Address!
Before September 11, when the President or I heard people talk about "the Middle East," we just thought they were referring to Maryland.
Read The Transcript>

Forget The Anthrax, We Got Demons!
A Thanksgiving Alert To Church Members>

SPECIAL REPORTS
America at War: Killing Folks Who Picked the Wrong God

May God Damn You To Hell if You Call Us Either Fanatics or Fundamentalists!
Click Here For Full Story!>

The Taliban Pin-Up Girl!
Take A Peek!>

Whose God is More Vicious?
Take this quiz and get Bible-based information on how God is going to defeat Allah!
Click Here For Quiz!>

How To Spot A Terrorist
An FBI Bureau sketch artist has generated a composite of a typical Middle Eastern male.
Click Here For Details!>

UNITED WE STAND:
America's Secret Weapon Against Wacky Islamic Fundamentalists
Read The Classified Document!>

Vogue Afghanistan
What's Osama wearing?
Click Here To Find Out!>

The White House Department of Faith: Now open for business.
Click Here For Info>


		National Headlines In Celebration of Ramadan, President Bush Declares Tuesday: "National Kill An Infidel Day." "We're asking folks to keep it down to one since the whole thing is meant mainly as an olive branch to the Muslims, rather than a genuine desire to kill infidels, whatever they are." Attorney General John Ashcroft Authorizes CIA to Begin Intercepting Prayers "If folks are on their knees asking for box cutters or plutonium, we can't sit around waiting for the Lord to give it to them!" Local News Landover Post Office Shut Down! A Virulent Demon Slipped Out of an Unsealed Envelop And Strangled Mrs. Greenville, who was operating the ZIP-code sorter. No mail will be delivered until further notice unless the envelope is clearly marked, "TITHES."

Planet of the Apes
Charlton Heston does his best to save Christians from Hollywood's vehicle for Satan's big lie: EVOLUTION.

Jurassic Park III: Demons, not Dinosaurs
Tomb Raider: Spitting on the Resurrection
Hannibal Delightfully Biblical!
The Grinch Satan Painted Green
Castaway A Life Without Jesus
Blair Witch 2 A Christian Movie!
The Patriot Anti-Christian Trash!
Thomas & The Magic Railroad
Dinosaur: Not for Children
Me, Myself & Satan: Demon Possession
Gladiator: Homosexual lust!
American Psycho: Bill Clinton
Man on the Moon: ...or Devil in Hell?
Toy Story 2: Satan's New Film
The Green Mile: Men, Prison, Showers
Blair Witch Project: Dora Jean Reviews
Boys Don't Cry: "Bull Dykes Don't Cry"
American Beauty: Ugly Satanic Slop
The Talented Mr. Ripley: Fine Christian Fare

CapAlert:
Christian Movie Reviews With Which We Agree

We have a permanent injunction against all unsaved persons. If you are unsaved, you are not allowed within a 10-mile radius of our church, nor are you allowed on this website. Kindly leave, and be about the Devil's business, for you are not welcome here. Glory!

Link To Our Bible Quiz Page (click here) Test your Bible knowledge by taking one of these quizzes!
How Does God Spot A Christian?
The Bible Diet Quiz
The Bible Slavery Quiz
Bible Anagram Flash Quiz
New "test" ament Quiz
Role of Women Bible Quiz
Creation Science Quiz
New Testament Damnation Quiz
The Wrath of God Quiz
Bible Punishment Quiz
Bible Sex Quiz
What Did Jesus Say? Flash Quiz!

GODLY JESSE HELMS QUOTES!
"All Latins are volatile people. Hence, I was not surprised at the volatile reaction."
-Jesse Helms 1986
Click the link above for more wonderful quotes from this True Christian® American.

Intervention!
Cognoscenti
We Need Dick!
Betty's Notes
Abortion Rumor
Bush Quotes!
Court Supremes
Church Ladies

Pray for Jenna!
LIE-berman
Laura Bush Interview
Clinton - Porn Lover
Liberals Hate
Register To Vote>
Boycott Disney

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