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Landover Wins National Christian Truth or Tolerance Campaign by Turning Away 235% More People in 2002

"From the uttermost to the guttermost," recalls Pastor Deacon Fred, "our godly church proudly turned away so many lost, pathetic souls last year we lost count around April. I don't know if it is the failing economy we inherited from that sex maniac Bill Clinton, but we saw a huge increase this year in filthy, hungry ragamuffins pounding on our imported African ebony church doors. We've also had famous so-called dignitaries try to slip past our security, too. It just makes my blood boil when I think of all the sloppy trash, claiming to want to know Jesus and they have the effrontery to show up in our spotless sanctuary without a coat and tie."

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The Two Towers
Is Hollywood hiding the homosexual habits of hobbits in the new film, The Two Towers?

Scooby Doo Occult Lessons
Ice Age A Secular Lie!
Harry Potter Witchcraft
Monsters A Talking Testicle!
Planet of the Apes: Beastiality
Jurassic Park III: Demons, not Dinosaurs
Tomb Raider: Spitting on the Resurrection
Hannibal Delightfully Biblical!
The Grinch Satan Painted Green
Castaway A Life Without Jesus
Blair Witch 2 A Christian Movie!
The Patriot Anti-Christian Trash!
Thomas & The Magic Railroad
Dinosaur: Not for Children
Me, Myself & Satan: Demon Possession
Gladiator: Homosexual lust!
American Psycho: Bill Clinton
Man on the Moon: ...or Devil in Hell?
Toy Story 2: Satan's New Film
The Green Mile: Men, Prison, Showers
Blair Witch Project: Dora Jean Reviews
Boys Don't Cry: "Bull Dykes Don't Cry"
American Beauty: Ugly Satanic Slop
The Talented Mr. Ripley: Fine Christian Fare

Christian Movie Reviews With Which We Agree

We have a permanent injunction against all unsaved persons. If you are unsaved, you are not allowed within a 10-mile radius of our church, nor are you allowed on this website. Kindly leave, and be about the Devil's business, for you are not welcome here. Glory!

Link To Our Bible Quiz Page (click here) Test your Bible knowledge by taking one of these quizzes!

God's Favorite Ways To Kill
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God vs. Allah Quiz
Bible Sex Quiz II
How Does God Spot A Christian?
Bible Punishment Quiz II
The Bible Diet Quiz
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Role of Women Bible Quiz
Creation Science Quiz
New Testament Damnation Quiz
The Wrath of God Quiz
Bible Punishment Quiz
Bible Sex Quiz
What Did Jesus Say? Flash Quiz!

On January 20, 2001, President George W. Bush signed an executive order establishing the United States Department of Faith (DOF). Headed by Mr. Bush's and God's favorite church
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